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>There is a dark edge to this whinging which ends up in the "the government should enforce wifes for men" area whic his really messed up. Arranged marriage is
by imbnwa 4y ago
>There is a dark edge to this whinging which ends up in the "the government should enforce wifes for men" area whic his really messed up.
Arranged marriage is a cultural approximate and almost all of my co-workers' marriages were born of this method; they don't seem unhappy and miserable.
I'm not saying "Western culture should bring back arranged marriage", which, when it did exist, was largely an aristocratic thing, however I am wondering whether successful marriage is as conditioned on a checklist of expectations (which is undefined here, so who knows what that means) as it seems, and I am wondering whether its really the case the vast majority of males are toxic man-children; I don't think anyone's done the work to actually prove that.
Certainly not this article being cited which is simply relaying a state of affairs then presuming the causes where the study it cites strictly suggests there's something wrong with individualistic societies in toto
- AviationAtom 4y agoArranged marriages actually tend to work out quite well in India. People might be quick to say it's because they're forced into it, but studies have actually said otherwise. It forces a couple to actually learn to work together, rather than being immediately blinded by love, then the flame quickly dying.
- imbnwa 4y agoYes, my South Indian co-workers report their satisfaction as I was greatly curious. They are also nicer people, more in control of their emotions, less anxious, than the Americans I've worked with, so perhaps the study being cited in great-grandparent's Psychology Today article is onto something when it suggests that there's something wrong with individualistic societies like American's rather than the more partisan take in the article.
- xen2xen1 4y agoMaybe marriages work exactly as much as people make them work regardless of how it starts?
- AviationAtom 4y agoIndian culture is vastly different from American. I actually kind of envy it, as it seems to have much of what America is lacking. A friendship with Indians has a strength it's almost hard to comprehend as an American. Once you are welcomed into their community you truly become a part of it. For me a big bonus is they always want to make sure you're well fed.
- lotsofpulp 4y agoDoes it force a couple to work together, or the woman to adjust? If women had financial independence, would it show the same results?