Let me be the first to apologize for the excessive methane emissions of 2022: I really didn't mean it. My doctor had given me orders to reduce my intake of ani

Let me be the first to apologize for the excessive methane emissions of 2022: I really didn't mean it. My doctor had given me orders to reduce my intake of animal fats. A diet of beans, rice and corn seemed to be just the thing. Instead I have failed humanity and brought this methane plague upon my house. I tried ending it all but my "strike anywhere" matches fell apart when I made the attempt, and I had only two of those. Perhaps that was a sign of forgiveness from the Lord?