3 ms·

A woman will very unlikely give you an honest advice. They are usually not made for that with friends. They usually just re-assure and "support" you. That's bee

by csomar 4y ago

A woman will very unlikely give you an honest advice. They are usually not made for that with friends. They usually just re-assure and "support" you. That's been my experience. There are two types of woman who will be-friend you platonically: Woman who are interested in you sexually as a partner and want to be close to your radar, just in case. Woman who are not interested in you but find value in your friendship (either connections, money, emotional support, etc...) In both cases, it's a bad deal for you. You are much better finding your own real partner instead of masquerading around other woman to forget about your lacking in that area. Friendships with woman do exist. But they are limited by the fact that man and woman have very different hobbies and interests. That is, unless you are interested spending Saturday evening looking out for the perfect face mask or the color of your jeans; and I don't mean that in a pejorative way.

mif 4y ago
Holy shit.
adamhp 4y ago
Holy shit you have not met many women.
- bloopernova 4y ago
  I have been arguing with myself about replying to the comment you replied to. Good lord that person reveals a lot about themselves in it. And none of it is good. If they didn't seem to be angry, I'd pity them.
  - qup 4y ago
    Imagine if I summed you up based on only this comment and how you were publicly not-very-nice to a guy who volunteered his opinion/experience to further a discussion. Most importantly, you're just attacking a human being, you haven't even engaged with them.
- padfootprong 4y ago
  Or people, by the looks of it.
seventhtiger 4y ago
You are somewhat close minded. Don't take this as a quick accusation of some -ism. I just get that you're not at all open to new experiences. * You think you figured out people. But non of us have figured out people. Being open minded means at least trying to give any person a chance. You already have them divided into types and dismissed. * You think to be friends you need people with the same hobbies and interests. * You think your hobbies and interests are already set. Whether your goal is to find a partner or to find friends, trying to figure out and decide about people in the privacy of your mind, then projecting that on the world will hamper your goals. Humble yourself, assume you're wrong, and allow people to surprise you.
- zelphirkalt 4y ago
  > * You think to be friends you need people with the same hobbies and interests. At least in that point there is some truth to it. What activities will you engage in with people, if you do not share hobbies or interests? Activities will be quite limited, unless you discover some shared interest or hobby. Maybe your shared interest will be once a week sitting in a café and talking about your job. As long as it is a shared interest, you got at least something to do with the other person. Socialization in many countries around the world is still very much having strong bias for men and women roles and interests. Without high awareness of this, it is also very difficult for parents to do anything about this. Children are usually not 24/7 with their parents either. They spend a lot of time in other institutions like kindergarden and school, where they usually face a mainstream bias. This means, that quite often there is a trend for men and women to also have different hobbies and interests. There is of course overlap in many areas, but not everywhere. It is slowly changing, but it will still take a long time. Just to give examples: When I studied CS, only 10% were women. Looking at biology and psychology for example, we have almost the opposite situation.
  - seventhtiger 4y ago
    I agree with everything you said. Of course everything you said is a description of the reasons that go into making it less common. I disagree with the prescription that it shouldn't/couldn't. Saying something is unlikely is different to closing that door. People and society are complex, and the long tail is really long. That's why being open minded and really giving the person in front of you some consideration is really important.

by csomar 4y ago

mif 4y ago

Holy shit.

adamhp 4y ago

Holy shit you have not met many women.

bloopernova 4y ago
I have been arguing with myself about replying to the comment you replied to. Good lord that person reveals a lot about themselves in it. And none of it is good. If they didn't seem to be angry, I'd pity them.
- qup 4y ago
  Imagine if I summed you up based on only this comment and how you were publicly not-very-nice to a guy who volunteered his opinion/experience to further a discussion. Most importantly, you're just attacking a human being, you haven't even engaged with them.
padfootprong 4y ago
Or people, by the looks of it.

seventhtiger 4y ago

You are somewhat close minded. Don't take this as a quick accusation of some -ism. I just get that you're not at all open to new experiences. * You think you figured out people. But non of us have figured out people. Being open minded means at least trying to give any person a chance. You already have them divided into types and dismissed. * You think to be friends you need people with the same hobbies and interests. * You think your hobbies and interests are already set. Whether your goal is to find a partner or to find friends, trying to figure out and decide about people in the privacy of your mind, then projecting that on the world will hamper your goals. Humble yourself, assume you're wrong, and allow people to surprise you.

zelphirkalt 4y ago
> * You think to be friends you need people with the same hobbies and interests. At least in that point there is some truth to it. What activities will you engage in with people, if you do not share hobbies or interests? Activities will be quite limited, unless you discover some shared interest or hobby. Maybe your shared interest will be once a week sitting in a café and talking about your job. As long as it is a shared interest, you got at least something to do with the other person. Socialization in many countries around the world is still very much having strong bias for men and women roles and interests. Without high awareness of this, it is also very difficult for parents to do anything about this. Children are usually not 24/7 with their parents either. They spend a lot of time in other institutions like kindergarden and school, where they usually face a mainstream bias. This means, that quite often there is a trend for men and women to also have different hobbies and interests. There is of course overlap in many areas, but not everywhere. It is slowly changing, but it will still take a long time. Just to give examples: When I studied CS, only 10% were women. Looking at biology and psychology for example, we have almost the opposite situation.
- seventhtiger 4y ago
  I agree with everything you said. Of course everything you said is a description of the reasons that go into making it less common. I disagree with the prescription that it shouldn't/couldn't. Saying something is unlikely is different to closing that door. People and society are complex, and the long tail is really long. That's why being open minded and really giving the person in front of you some consideration is really important.