4 ms·

In the context of this post what does "But never forget they're co-workers, not family." mean? What should the author have done differently and how would that

In the context of this post what does "But never forget they're co-workers, not family." mean? What should the author have done differently and how would that have changed things?

Manuel_D 4y ago
It means you need to be cognizant of the fact that if it's in the company's best interest to let you go, they will. And this is not unusual or peculiar. This passage stood out to me: > The email said we'd lose access at 12:30pm. At 12:28 I decided, "I'll break up with you before you can dump me." I signed out and closed my work machine for the last time. > And then I started to cry. > I cried despite the generous severance package. I cried despite emotionally preparing for the moment. I cried despite being genuinely excited for what comes next. For nine years, so much of my identity has been wrapped up in my relationship with Twilio, and that relationship ended today. It is abundantly clear that the author invested too much emotion and too much of his identity into his employer. Your relationship is not one of family. You can't fire your brother or child [1], but company can and do fire their employees. The fact that he had such a profound reaction means he needed to invest less emotion in his employer and adopt a more mercenary attitude. I've been laid off before, it happened to me when my previous employer was heavily impacted by COVID. I didn't cry, my attitude was "yep, makes sense - I'd probably do the same in their shoes." I don't want to sound mean or belittling, but it's just not healthy to have the author's reaction to being laid off. I find it funny how people talk about a "mercenary" attitude in the workforce with a negative connotation. What's not ethical is when people treat military service like picking up jobs off LinkedIn, and apply the same attitude of the civilian workforce towards the profession of arms. It's totally normal to have a "mercenary" attitude in the civilian workforce. It doesn't mean don't be friends with your co-workers - I'm sure the dudes at Blackwater and Executive Outcomes are friends with their co-workers - but it does mean you need to be prepared for the day that the company decides your employment is no longer necessary. 1. to be pedantic, people do cut off family members, but usually for reasons far more serious than maximizing profit
- librish 4y ago
  It's not abundantly clear to me. The author probably enjoyed those nine years a lot more than someone who adopts a mercenary attitude would have. Human beings love belonging places. What did this emotional investment cost him? Slightly more pain when the relationship ended (and it seems like they're already excited for what's next)?
  - Manuel_D 4y ago
    The emotional investment may have made him miss out on more interesting, better compensated, or otherwise more desirable jobs. And the pain at its end does not correspond to more enjoyment. I don't think a mercenary attitude diminishes the enjoyment of working at all. Like I said earlier, the Blackwater and Executive Outcomes guys probably enjoy their jobs just as much as typical soldiers - possibly even more. I don't this this is a trade off between more enjoyment and greater emotional damage at the end. It's just as much enjoyment, better impact on his life situation, and less pain when his job ends. A strictly better set of outcomes.
    - librish 4y ago
      I think we'll have to agree to disagree, that's not my experience.

In the context of this post what does "But never forget they're co-workers, not family." mean? What should the author have done differently and how would that have changed things?

Manuel_D 4y ago

It means you need to be cognizant of the fact that if it's in the company's best interest to let you go, they will. And this is not unusual or peculiar. This passage stood out to me: > The email said we'd lose access at 12:30pm. At 12:28 I decided, "I'll break up with you before you can dump me." I signed out and closed my work machine for the last time. > And then I started to cry. > I cried despite the generous severance package. I cried despite emotionally preparing for the moment. I cried despite being genuinely excited for what comes next. For nine years, so much of my identity has been wrapped up in my relationship with Twilio, and that relationship ended today. It is abundantly clear that the author invested too much emotion and too much of his identity into his employer. Your relationship is not one of family. You can't fire your brother or child [1], but company can and do fire their employees. The fact that he had such a profound reaction means he needed to invest less emotion in his employer and adopt a more mercenary attitude. I've been laid off before, it happened to me when my previous employer was heavily impacted by COVID. I didn't cry, my attitude was "yep, makes sense - I'd probably do the same in their shoes." I don't want to sound mean or belittling, but it's just not healthy to have the author's reaction to being laid off. I find it funny how people talk about a "mercenary" attitude in the workforce with a negative connotation. What's not ethical is when people treat military service like picking up jobs off LinkedIn, and apply the same attitude of the civilian workforce towards the profession of arms. It's totally normal to have a "mercenary" attitude in the civilian workforce. It doesn't mean don't be friends with your co-workers - I'm sure the dudes at Blackwater and Executive Outcomes are friends with their co-workers - but it does mean you need to be prepared for the day that the company decides your employment is no longer necessary. 1. to be pedantic, people do cut off family members, but usually for reasons far more serious than maximizing profit

librish 4y ago
It's not abundantly clear to me. The author probably enjoyed those nine years a lot more than someone who adopts a mercenary attitude would have. Human beings love belonging places. What did this emotional investment cost him? Slightly more pain when the relationship ended (and it seems like they're already excited for what's next)?
- Manuel_D 4y ago
  The emotional investment may have made him miss out on more interesting, better compensated, or otherwise more desirable jobs. And the pain at its end does not correspond to more enjoyment. I don't think a mercenary attitude diminishes the enjoyment of working at all. Like I said earlier, the Blackwater and Executive Outcomes guys probably enjoy their jobs just as much as typical soldiers - possibly even more. I don't this this is a trade off between more enjoyment and greater emotional damage at the end. It's just as much enjoyment, better impact on his life situation, and less pain when his job ends. A strictly better set of outcomes.
  - librish 4y ago
    I think we'll have to agree to disagree, that's not my experience.