You have a right to do whatever you want with it. You can take a hacksaw to it, hit it with a hammer, flash the BIOS with random noise. You won't be imprisoned,

You have a right to do whatever you want with it. You can take a hacksaw to it, hit it with a hammer, flash the BIOS with random noise. You won't be imprisoned, the government won't disappear you, the company won't sue you and won't care at all. What you are demanding is more like "after I bought it and the transaction is complete, I want the company to put person-years of unpaid work into making it work a different way which was never offered or part of the deal". That's completely different.