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Envy can be a positive and healthy force. E.g., I've always wanted to work with people whose skills I envy. That gives me reason to learn more and progress. I

by yazzku 4y ago

Envy can be a positive and healthy force. E.g., I've always wanted to work with people whose skills I envy. That gives me reason to learn more and progress. I think what the article refers to "envy" is a complete lack of self-esteem. Envy is healthy when you acknowledge your limitations. > But envy is one of the most pervasive problems in today’s world, especially as social media normalizes the successes of others, making you feel like you’re “underperforming” the average when in reality you’re being shown a highlight reel of outliers. This isn't really "envy", or not on its own.

JadeNB 4y ago
> Envy can be a positive and healthy force. E.g., I've always wanted to work with people whose skills I envy. That gives me reason to learn more and progress. My understanding of the word is borne out by the formal definition, e.g., in Wiktionary (https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/envy https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/envy): “Resentful desire of something possessed by another or others (but not limited to material possessions).” That ‘resentful’ part is key to why I think that envy is (almost?) always negative. It is good to work with people whose skills you admire; if you envy their skills then you not only want to have those skills yourself, but resent that they have them.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
- yazzku 4y ago
  Ok, that was a polite way of saying "English, motherfucker!"
- karmakaze 4y ago
  I'm not good at emotions and can really only recognize about 3 or 4 in myself. I do try to understand what value each emotion can have, on the presumption that if it had no value, it ought not to continue existing. Envy is the hardest one for me to find value in. At best it can be a kind of competitive motivating factor. That's all I've got. I think I avoid envy by first believing that 'I' could have been anyone on the planet, but just happened to be 'me'. Given that as a starting point, do the most with what you have. Even then I don't do near close to the max, so I'm not in any position to complain or desire beyond my means which I haven't realized.
  - jamiek88 4y ago
    >Even then I don't do near close to the max, so I'm not in any position to complain or desire beyond my means which I haven't realized. Interesting perspective, i like that a lot. How can I begrudge others things when I haven’t even maximized my own capability and or circumstances in life?
m463 4y ago
sounds like admire not envy
JohnFen 4y ago
> I've always wanted to work with people whose skills I envy. I want to be around people who have skills and qualities I would like to learn. I can't honestly say I envy any of them, though.
anigbrowl 4y ago
Though noting your other comment below, envy is less about wanting something for oneself as wanting exclusive possession of it - not 'I wish to have that too' but 'that should be mine, not yours.'
mrg3_2013 4y ago
You are "technically" right about the definition of envy - but I think OP is using envy to indicate "wanting something that you feel you deserve". Sometimes you feel you deserved more. Sometimes you feel others deserved less.

by yazzku 4y ago

JadeNB 4y ago

> Envy can be a positive and healthy force. E.g., I've always wanted to work with people whose skills I envy. That gives me reason to learn more and progress. My understanding of the word is borne out by the formal definition, e.g., in Wiktionary (https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/envy https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/envy): “Resentful desire of something possessed by another or others (but not limited to material possessions).” That ‘resentful’ part is key to why I think that envy is (almost?) always negative. It is good to work with people whose skills you admire; if you envy their skills then you not only want to have those skills yourself, but resent that they have them.

deleted 4y ago
[deleted]
yazzku 4y ago
Ok, that was a polite way of saying "English, motherfucker!"
karmakaze 4y ago
I'm not good at emotions and can really only recognize about 3 or 4 in myself. I do try to understand what value each emotion can have, on the presumption that if it had no value, it ought not to continue existing. Envy is the hardest one for me to find value in. At best it can be a kind of competitive motivating factor. That's all I've got. I think I avoid envy by first believing that 'I' could have been anyone on the planet, but just happened to be 'me'. Given that as a starting point, do the most with what you have. Even then I don't do near close to the max, so I'm not in any position to complain or desire beyond my means which I haven't realized.
- jamiek88 4y ago
  >Even then I don't do near close to the max, so I'm not in any position to complain or desire beyond my means which I haven't realized. Interesting perspective, i like that a lot. How can I begrudge others things when I haven’t even maximized my own capability and or circumstances in life?

m463 4y ago

sounds like admire not envy

JohnFen 4y ago

> I've always wanted to work with people whose skills I envy. I want to be around people who have skills and qualities I would like to learn. I can't honestly say I envy any of them, though.

anigbrowl 4y ago

Though noting your other comment below, envy is less about wanting something for oneself as wanting exclusive possession of it - not 'I wish to have that too' but 'that should be mine, not yours.'

mrg3_2013 4y ago

You are "technically" right about the definition of envy - but I think OP is using envy to indicate "wanting something that you feel you deserve". Sometimes you feel you deserved more. Sometimes you feel others deserved less.