2 ms·

> What’s the line? What’s the number where it’s not weird? There is no line that's weird. What's weird is expecting there to be a line like %50.7% female or %1

> What’s the line? What’s the number where it’s not weird? There is no line that's weird. What's weird is expecting there to be a line like %50.7% female or %14.2 black. > (I’m assuming you’re male) how many times have you had to disengage from a professional group conversation because one person is just constantly hitting on you? Ask your women coworkers how often this happens. If this is happening at work it sounds like an unprofessional work environment in which case you have recourse. If the problem persists after making the unprofessional behavior known to leadership then there's probably systemic issues with that organization that go beyond just sexual harassment. As an aside, I've had to disengage from professional group conversations a number of times because of my political and religious beliefs, which also should not be a problem at work. > Everyone is different and should be judged as such, but I’ve been in community events where this sort of behavior isn’t rampant and it’s a million times better. And yeah, turns out that having a more representative organizational community does wonders for that. This sounds like you choosing how to spend your free time and if you think the "quality" of an event is effected by how many different skin colors and the percentage of gender participate, great. It also sounds like nothing is stopping you from doing that so I don't see an issue here.

rtpg 4y ago
What I want, is for people to feel more or less welcome at any event. There are events where this is the case, a lot where they are not. > As an aside, I've had to disengage from professional group conversations a number of times because of my political and religious beliefs, which also should not be a problem at work. "Me sharing my political beliefs in a work environment has a negative reaction" is different from "this guy keeps on hitting on me at this event". I don't want to be too dismissive, and yeah it is better if an environment is open, but for some stuff there is no "cover", so to speak. (To put a finer point on it, "This guy keeps on hitting on me at this event" happens _even if someone completely keeps their mouth shut and does absolutely nothing to encourage it_) You are right that in a company event or something, there's loads of recourse. The difficulty is more in semi-professional events, run by conference organizers and where there are many "external" people. There is often no clear chain of responsibility, a lack of real consequences for bad actors, and ultimately it means that there are people who feel unsafe, _no matter how little they say_.

rtpg 4y ago

What I want, is for people to feel more or less welcome at any event. There are events where this is the case, a lot where they are not. > As an aside, I've had to disengage from professional group conversations a number of times because of my political and religious beliefs, which also should not be a problem at work. "Me sharing my political beliefs in a work environment has a negative reaction" is different from "this guy keeps on hitting on me at this event". I don't want to be too dismissive, and yeah it is better if an environment is open, but for some stuff there is no "cover", so to speak. (To put a finer point on it, "This guy keeps on hitting on me at this event" happens _even if someone completely keeps their mouth shut and does absolutely nothing to encourage it_) You are right that in a company event or something, there's loads of recourse. The difficulty is more in semi-professional events, run by conference organizers and where there are many "external" people. There is often no clear chain of responsibility, a lack of real consequences for bad actors, and ultimately it means that there are people who feel unsafe, _no matter how little they say_.