4 ms·

(CW OCD) Twice in my life I've become helplessly obsessed with a given topic to the point that nearly everything I saw, heard, or thought about would build a ne

(CW OCD) Twice in my life I've become helplessly obsessed with a given topic to the point that nearly everything I saw, heard, or thought about would build a new association back to the topic, forming a feedback loop. The first time it lasted a year. No one could tell because I was just acting like a weird teenager to them, but it was hugely debilitating. I couldn't get off the ride. The second time, maybe fifteen years later, I had since researched the condition. I recognized it was recurring with a new topic and managed to stop it over several straight days of deliberate, flashy distraction. By that time I had sought and found professional help, from which I learned quite a lot more. As far as my coworkers knew, I just took a few sick days. They didn't know I was struggling for sanity. I've been in good mental health for many years now, and I'm prepared. There are things no one can do for us and we must face ourselves. Only you can take a first step to seek help, or step back onto a known healthy path. Thanks for starting this conversation.

mach1ne 4y ago
Interesting. What condition was this? Its psychology intrigues me.
- easeout 4y ago
  Here it is. To me it's like a demon you can beat by knowing its name. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence
  - everlost 4y ago
    Fascinating. But is Limerence only when the obsession is targeted towards a person, rather than idea/object? I've noticed strong feelings of obsession towards an idea/goal, particularly when it's not achievable.
    - easeout 4y ago
      I've only experienced it as described in the article, with a person as the limerent object. The limerent state is sustained by uncertainty, the small and tantalizing chance it could work out the way you want and the undeniable chance it could fail. One way out of the situation is to make success impossible (say, by a breakup) and therefore reach certainty of the outcome. This is of course the last thing most people would do, but to end what feels like permanent madness, you take that deal. I think if this article really described you, you would stop dead in your tracks reading it. There is what the general public casually calls OCD and intrusive thoughts, and then there are many horrifying flavors of the real deal.
- wellanyway 4y ago
  Obsessive compulsive disorder.
deleted 4y ago
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mach1ne 4y ago

Interesting. What condition was this? Its psychology intrigues me.

easeout 4y ago
Here it is. To me it's like a demon you can beat by knowing its name. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence
- everlost 4y ago
  Fascinating. But is Limerence only when the obsession is targeted towards a person, rather than idea/object? I've noticed strong feelings of obsession towards an idea/goal, particularly when it's not achievable.
  - easeout 4y ago
    I've only experienced it as described in the article, with a person as the limerent object. The limerent state is sustained by uncertainty, the small and tantalizing chance it could work out the way you want and the undeniable chance it could fail. One way out of the situation is to make success impossible (say, by a breakup) and therefore reach certainty of the outcome. This is of course the last thing most people would do, but to end what feels like permanent madness, you take that deal. I think if this article really described you, you would stop dead in your tracks reading it. There is what the general public casually calls OCD and intrusive thoughts, and then there are many horrifying flavors of the real deal.
wellanyway 4y ago
Obsessive compulsive disorder.

deleted 4y ago

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