I'd say... Keep taking adequate levels of care of your health and financial situation. Maintain activity outside of work. Preferably something engaging enough

I'd say... Keep taking adequate levels of care of your health and financial situation. Maintain activity outside of work. Preferably something engaging enough that you're not inclined to ruminate much while you're in the activity. Do you have at least some friend or similar who gets your problem rather than just brush it off? If so, maybe try talking more with them. Be skeptical of getting diagnosed with clinical depression as long as there are situational factors which motivate feeling depressed in the colloquial sense. In particular, be very skeptical of pharmacological treatment against clinical depression unless and until a strong case has been made that you actually have the disorder, and in a form for which the meds are likely to be of help. (Note said situational factors and get started on fixing a judicious small selection of them.) Test the assumption about admission to the masters programs you want. There are often other ways to enter than high grades, particularly if you can demonstrate aptitude or strong interest in practice, which does seem to be the case for you. Communicate with people taking those programs and people teaching in them, if possible. Try to get a good idea about whether the reality of that life is indeed what you picture it to be, and ask for advice about alternative possibilities to get there. A point which maybe needs to be addressed, for your own sake for the future, is why is there such a disconnect between your interest/motivation and your grades? It could well be that there's something flawed in the way this is being taught or scored locally, but it's still at least partially on you that you didn't make a strong play in whatever game they have set up, despite having entered participation of your own accord. Alternatively there could for instance have been other motivations or needs which claimed enough of your time, attention, etc that you didn't prioritize enough to success in the courses. Examining your values shouldn't really be handed over to anyone else, though doing it together with the right people could help clarity of vision a great deal. While it's probably hard to really believe the advice without digesting experiences of a couple of substantial failures of one's own first, I think mattficke here ( https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34665667 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34665667 ) has excellent points about the leeway for not getting everything right the first time (and then some). Good on you for the recovery so far, and I wish you better success and satisfaction by the end of the next round.