4 ms·
Instead of strategy in the real world which is what most people here will give you, I’ll give strategy for managing your mind. It comes from two decades of hard
by EGreg 4y ago
Instead of strategy in the real world which is what most people here will give you, I’ll give strategy for managing your mind. It comes from two decades of hard won lessons through my own stugglr and hustling.
You said yourself - you got cocky. You shot too high, and you failed. It is natural to feel hopeless and lost after that, if you don’t have the skills to mentally manage it and refocus. So there is nothing wrong with you. Only your strategies. You’re young.
First of all, to be happy, look down - not up. See how many people throughout history and in other countries had a lot less than you and a lot worse conditions, and they could still be happy. Can you feel have that you have more than they ever did? Air conditioning, transportstion, healthcare, electricity. You can do a lot more than most humans throughout history could.
Most of all, find the anxiety and fear that is behind your feelings. Write down what you are most afraid of. And then write down all the things that need to happen in order for that to come about. Then for each of those things, write the multiple mechanisms that are in place to prevent that for the average person — you may want other people’s help w this step (insurance, support groups, family, limited liability and bankruptcy protection). After you have thought through and worked to produce this list, then you will start to feel you have a handle on your life! You’ll be able to take risks knowing that YOU ARE SAFE!
Allow yourself to be ok with failing in small ways. The first step to success is noticing when it’s safe to fail. This is a repeatable skill most people don’t focus on honing. Michael Jordan said “I fail over and over snd that is precisely why I succeed”.
Learn to spot when you can take risks and practice. Ask yourself “what is the worst case scenario?” If it is not bad at all, go for it nearly every time! You’ll encounter the average scenario which is even better and often positive!
It is how I made connections with a lot of famous people who opened doors for me later. Most people wouldn’t try. For example: https://youtu.be/cX7K6bhjefU https://youtu.be/cX7K6bhjefU
It is also why most people don’t learn a lot of skills where they havd very low competence in the first place. They’re afraid to wade into a cold pool a bit. You can particularly see the older generation lacking the skills to use software effectively (subconsciously afraid to try the buttons) or non-STEM people lacking analytical and math skills (subconsciously afraid due to their education). Conquer this fear by breaking things into small experiments that are safe to fail.
Hey, if you’re bold and entrepreneurial, you can even do things like this (I had zero experience when I attempted this, yet I had so much fun with friends and it reached hundreds of thousands of people): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVypyAfcmA0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVypyAfcmA0
Learn how systems work (postgrad, VC funding, whatever) and what the incentives of each individual role are. Don’t try to fight the system. Instead learn to repeatably give each decision maker you need to what they want as part of their role. If you can give them FAR MORE than the average person, they’ll value and appreciate you and you can use that to open doors.
Learn to break down big steps into smaller ones. And learn how to grow a brand where you organize things and get people to come into your world. This creates scarcity. To get a customer, have them come on your show and talk about their own community. Have them put up a deposit or pay for calendly slots to be prioritized for your scarce time. And so on. To get an investor for $10,000, have them invest $100 first, when you don’t need it, and show results.
Also realize that most big failures recede with time. Learn that no huge success can come overnight, unless you get super lucky. Accept the loss and move on. Make a long term plan. Then triple all your deadlines. Make time for your personal life. At your age you’ll think that career is the most important, but you’ll have decades to continue growing it when you uave a family. Focus on personal goals before career goals. This goes for women as well as men!