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In my opinion, you are interpreting it incorrectly. Look from their perspective. "My man is so smart, competent and emotionally stable. I can rely on him for
by isthisthingon99 4y ago
In my opinion, you are interpreting it incorrectly.
Look from their perspective.
"My man is so smart, competent and emotionally stable. I can rely on him for anything!"
"Oh no he's crying, does this mean our family won't survive? What do I do?"
It's not anything more complicated than that. Women can probably chime in to tell me if I'm right or wrong, but this is a human perspective, because children will feel the same way if the father cries.
- giantg2 4y agoBut it's unacceptable for a man to do/think the same.
- isthisthingon99 4y agoWe don't have to give birth. Being self reliant is thus our cross to bear.
- giantg2 4y agoThis comment makes no sense.
- isthisthingon99 4y agoWomen have the sacred responsibly to bring children to life. The least men can do is be reliable and handle their emotions.
- BazookaMusic 4y agoThis comment is quite demeaning to women's intelligence. There is no reason for a woman to consider that emotional openness on the side of her husband is an indication that their family won't survive. Crying is an expression of bottled up emotions, not an acceptance of defeat. Someone can cry and be invigorated to try harder to deal with their problems or they can cry but still be supportive to their spouse and provide emotional stability. Womens' reactions are dependent upon their personality, their values, their view of the other person, the environment, their current emotional state, their biology and a lot of other factors at any given moment. This explains the fact that some people in this thread talk about how their crying led to more fulfilling relationships why others talk about break ups and loss of trust. Even the point about children is completely arbitrary. Will children feel that their family won't survive due to their father crying about a lost relative? Doesn't it depend on their age? Furthermore, children need to see that their parents are humans and how to express their emotions. The alternative is that they find more indirect ways to do that like alcoholism, abuse, self-harm, extreme escapism and many other banes of today's society.
- isthisthingon99 4y ago[flagged]
- BazookaMusic 4y agoI'm not a man, but you are obviously looking for opinions validating yours, not to actually listen to women.
- isthisthingon99 4y agoYou didn't say you're a woman either and you write like a man.
- isthisthingon99 4y agoSo are you a woman then?
- dang 4y agoPersonal attacks will get you banned here, so please don't post like this. https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html Edit: you've broken the site guidelines so badly that I've banned the account. Please see https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34669955 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34669955.
- hilariouswhip 4y agoHe didn’t even interpret the reason for it. Just that a woman may be disgusted. You covered some reason for it on the woman’s part. While he (OP) seemed to only be talking about the man’s reason (motivation) to not act like that.
- isthisthingon99 4y ago[flagged]
- deleted 4y ago[deleted]
- dang 4y ago> are women generally known for rational thought That's beyond the pale and we've banned the account. Please don't create accounts to break HN's rules with. https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html
- isthisthingon99 4y agoWhich rule did I break? I didn't see clearly
- dang 4y agoThe one against flamebait for starters.
- wadd1e 4y agoOh no! he showed....gasps emotion! Surely you can't rely on someone who shows emotion? The stereotype of "the man cries = we're doomed" is perpetuated by people who think like you. It's not like men are designed to just not cry unless they're doomed.
- isthisthingon99 4y agoMen are only allowed to cry after they have proven themselves. For the most part this takes years.