> I propose that the main reason that most of us look more boring in public is that social predators lie in wait there. With friends, family, and close co-worke

> I propose that the main reason that most of us look more boring in public is that social predators lie in wait there. With friends, family, and close co-workers, we are around people that mostly want to like us, and know us rather well. Yes, they want us to conform too, but they apply this pressure in moderation. > Out in public, in contrast, we face bandits just looking for chances to gain social credit by taking us down, vis accusing us of violating the sacred. And like townspeople traveling among the bandits, we are in public pretty vulnerable to the kinds of bandits that afflict us. As someone else said, people have to make a living. If you don't have a job you cannot live, and most average people can't imagine surviving expulsion from society. Frankly, the people who belong to outrage cliques are generally toying with a weapon in capitalism that they understand well: if you cannot make money, you don't survive, even if you do your psyche and feeling of safety are likely lost. We have no perfect barometer for what makes someone fireable under the right circumstances. I remember years ago a key Drupal developer was outted for having a Gorean relationship with his wife that was mutually consenting. The mob succeeded and he was fired. Last I checked his blog he's doing fine, but I attribute that to kink becoming more mainstream around the time. Had it been a decade earlier he would've been unhireable in any place that employed women for how those folks had postured him. Anecdotally, this is the only place I talk about using mushrooms or LSD. I'm very selective, especially in tech, of going into any detail of my military service. There are some things you just know people won't know how to interpret or where their lack of familiarity will be a playground for their imagination. I say all that to say that the wise man says fewer words. You don't know what tomorrow's weapon will be, so it's easier to be boring except among a select few. Even people who believe outrage cliques are exceptional or rare will follow these same patterns.