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I'm not sure if I follow. Maybe you were thinking I meant "outclassed" literally? I just mean this seems like a case of men competing for womens attention in a

I'm not sure if I follow. Maybe you were thinking I meant "outclassed" literally? I just mean this seems like a case of men competing for womens attention in an arena where they have some kind of competitive advantage against the other men around them. If you can't go to the bar and be better looking than the guys around you, why not go to a class where you can be more helpful than the guys around you? As much as it creeps people out to say it out loud, a lot of social life is transactional and competitive. If you want friends or lovers, you have to have something to offer to them, and it has to be more valuable than what other people are offering. Some people don't have to find clever ways to make this work, or to think about this at all, because they are naturally valuable in some way. These guys are probably not that.

sacnoradhq 4y ago
Teenager behavior. I get it. Some kids (and people) need validation and obsess about it, while the winners (and old people like me) care less and go with the flow. Some folks, e.g., spoiled, expect their desired group to be attracted to and/or be friendly to them. (Brag alert: Myself and my SO - not models but not fugly.) Others expect others, e.g., incels, expect others to treat them badly, and have a proverbial chip on their shoulders. This can be a combination of social and physical looks. People who have physical disfigurements or unusual appearances have it rough in the world, that it can either make them stronger from repeated exposure or tear them down to retreat into and hate themselves and maybe others. Yellowman and (RIP) Shock G.
- ifyoubuildit 4y ago
  I don't understand why that would be specifically teenager behavior. Would it be teenager behavior to apply for jobs where you have relevant skills? It seems like the same thing to me. We all have something to offer in the right environment, and are relatively useless in the wrong environment. Is there something juvenile about recognizing that and aiming for the right environment?

sacnoradhq 4y ago

Teenager behavior. I get it. Some kids (and people) need validation and obsess about it, while the winners (and old people like me) care less and go with the flow. Some folks, e.g., spoiled, expect their desired group to be attracted to and/or be friendly to them. (Brag alert: Myself and my SO - not models but not fugly.) Others expect others, e.g., incels, expect others to treat them badly, and have a proverbial chip on their shoulders. This can be a combination of social and physical looks. People who have physical disfigurements or unusual appearances have it rough in the world, that it can either make them stronger from repeated exposure or tear them down to retreat into and hate themselves and maybe others. Yellowman and (RIP) Shock G.

ifyoubuildit 4y ago
I don't understand why that would be specifically teenager behavior. Would it be teenager behavior to apply for jobs where you have relevant skills? It seems like the same thing to me. We all have something to offer in the right environment, and are relatively useless in the wrong environment. Is there something juvenile about recognizing that and aiming for the right environment?