Ask my wife what she prefers and tell her what I prefer. Years of marriage before we figured out I hate cleaning small things (silverware and glasses) and she

Ask my wife what she prefers and tell her what I prefer. Years of marriage before we figured out I hate cleaning small things (silverware and glasses) and she hates cleaning big things (pots and pans). We permanently changed how we clean up after meals. Not exactly in line with your premise, but changed my entire outlook about expressing what I want or prefer about almost anything.