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Ditto. My old got cellphone in 9th grade, and all usual ones are blocked via pihole at home. Now in 12th, he does use Discord to communicate with a limited set

by yumraj 4y ago

Ditto. My old got cellphone in 9th grade, and all usual ones are blocked via pihole at home. Now in 12th, he does use Discord to communicate with a limited set of friends. But that’s it. I’ve said it before, the difference is that we don’t use any of the social media ourselves, so kids are OK. If parents use them but ask kids to refrain, obviously it’s not going to work.

dmitryminkovsky 4y ago
> Ditto. My old got cellphone in 9th grade, and all usual ones are blocked via pihole at home. Can’t they get around this by turning off Wi-Fi?
- PenguinCoder 4y ago
  I put my own work around in for that. Wireguard VPN on the phone, that connects back to home. Tasker profiles to enable the Wireguard VPN connection anytime the wifi is not connect to the home network. Pihole blocking still active via that method.
- yumraj 4y ago
  Yes, he can, and maybe he did (I can’t say with 100% certainty that that is not the case) but I believe that is where parents not using these social media comes into play. And, remember, Discord is allowed which I believe meets some of the needs. Also, any excessive data usage would show up in the family plan, which gives me confidence. I have always vocally expressed my hate for FB so maybe that helped. But all kids are different, and maybe what worked here won’t work for everyone.
  - BlueTemplar 4y ago
    Discord is social media too, though I would put it somewhere between HN and Facebook/Twitter in terms of harmfulness.
    - bart_spoon 4y ago
      I actually think Discord is even lower on the social media pole in terms of potential harm than HN. The things that seem to be the source of negative effects of social media seem to boil down to 1. dopamine-inducing like/point systems, 2. endless content feeds, and 3. the number of people interacting. HN has elements of all 3, but to a lesser degree than Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Reddit. Discord has the potential to have some of those to an extent, but especially if the user is simply using a server for them and their friends, practically none of those apply. It’s much closer to a simple group chat.
      - BlueTemplar 4y ago
        Well, it's not like group chat cannot have issues of its own (toxic admins, bullying... maybe not so much among friends, though as a teenager there's quite more risk to be paired with """friends"""), but you are right, I should perhaps (?) have left my concerns with Discord being a platform (closed, privately owned, for profit motive) that is US-based at the door in this specific discussion.
  - dmitryminkovsky 4y ago
    Thanks, was just wondering. I have a 3 year old and the prospect of raising him in today's tech environment is daunting. I can't imagine I'll have to deal with him having a smartphone, etc. It's terrible.
    - yumraj 4y ago
      I have a younger kid and we have set expectations that no cell phone before high school, I’m sure there’d be push back in middle school but we’ll be able to refer to the older kid. Fingers crossed.. Also, I had used the family thing with the older kid, so app installations required patent approval. So that at least forces usage of web apps if the kid is trying to bypass some restrictions, which in itself reduces the damage caused by these social networks.
- irrational 4y ago
  Not if it has a VPN, like circle (which is what we use), installed.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
giancarlostoro 4y ago
I would probably try out Discord for yourself if you never have, you can find anything Pihole is likely blocking indirectly via Discord, just saying.
- yumraj 4y ago
  Ah thank you. Yes, I have never used Discord and don’t know its capacities. I definitely should educate myself :) But the kid is now in senior year of high school so in worst case I did protect them for as long as I could. I won’t have much control from next year anyway..
  - giancarlostoro 4y ago
    Fair, I use it all the time, there's probably millions of different communities on it, think of reddit but with the capacity to share files, images, voice chat, video call, screenshare and so on. Now remember how insane reddit can get without all of that. Just wanted to post this in case someone else has no idea and they let their kids on that platform. Chances are high most people on Discord are fine, but bad can be found anywhere online.
nineteen999 4y ago
> I’ve said it before, the difference is that we don’t use any of the social media ourselves You wouldn't classify HN as social media?
- beej71 4y ago
  I'd say it's a subclass of social media. There's dopamine social media and non-dopamine social media.
  - nineteen999 4y ago
    I want to thank you for your socket guides etc. I learnt TCP/IP programming from those way back in the 90's! Presuming I am talking to the correct Beej here of course.
    - beej71 4y ago
      You're welcome! Always good to hear when the guides are used to good effect. :)
- yumraj 4y ago
  Touché! But, I'm pretty sure the Surgeon General did not have HN in mind while making that comment. :) HN is a social media, but it lacks certain capabilities that make it OK. First and foremost, there is no DM, then it's heavily moderated both by users as well as by DanG, and then it is text based. Also, based on my observation, the karma/like acquisition is not what drives people's comments here. So, while you're correct that it's a social media, it's not the cesspool of poison that the usual ones, that come to mind when we use the term social media, are.
  - deleted 4y ago
    [deleted]
- irrational 4y ago
  I wouldn’t. It’s not social without a social network. A social network implies that we are not all anonymous strangers. It implies we know people’s real names and other personal information about them. To the best of my knowledge, I have never interacted with the same person twice on HN (or Reddit). That’s basically the opposite of social or a network. When everyone is anonymous, and might even be a bot, it isn’t social media. Mostly because it is not social.

by yumraj 4y ago

dmitryminkovsky 4y ago

> Ditto. My old got cellphone in 9th grade, and all usual ones are blocked via pihole at home. Can’t they get around this by turning off Wi-Fi?

PenguinCoder 4y ago
I put my own work around in for that. Wireguard VPN on the phone, that connects back to home. Tasker profiles to enable the Wireguard VPN connection anytime the wifi is not connect to the home network. Pihole blocking still active via that method.
yumraj 4y ago
Yes, he can, and maybe he did (I can’t say with 100% certainty that that is not the case) but I believe that is where parents not using these social media comes into play. And, remember, Discord is allowed which I believe meets some of the needs. Also, any excessive data usage would show up in the family plan, which gives me confidence. I have always vocally expressed my hate for FB so maybe that helped. But all kids are different, and maybe what worked here won’t work for everyone.
- BlueTemplar 4y ago
  Discord is social media too, though I would put it somewhere between HN and Facebook/Twitter in terms of harmfulness.
  - bart_spoon 4y ago
    I actually think Discord is even lower on the social media pole in terms of potential harm than HN. The things that seem to be the source of negative effects of social media seem to boil down to 1. dopamine-inducing like/point systems, 2. endless content feeds, and 3. the number of people interacting. HN has elements of all 3, but to a lesser degree than Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Reddit. Discord has the potential to have some of those to an extent, but especially if the user is simply using a server for them and their friends, practically none of those apply. It’s much closer to a simple group chat.
    - BlueTemplar 4y ago
      Well, it's not like group chat cannot have issues of its own (toxic admins, bullying... maybe not so much among friends, though as a teenager there's quite more risk to be paired with """friends"""), but you are right, I should perhaps (?) have left my concerns with Discord being a platform (closed, privately owned, for profit motive) that is US-based at the door in this specific discussion.
- dmitryminkovsky 4y ago
  Thanks, was just wondering. I have a 3 year old and the prospect of raising him in today's tech environment is daunting. I can't imagine I'll have to deal with him having a smartphone, etc. It's terrible.
  - yumraj 4y ago
    I have a younger kid and we have set expectations that no cell phone before high school, I’m sure there’d be push back in middle school but we’ll be able to refer to the older kid. Fingers crossed.. Also, I had used the family thing with the older kid, so app installations required patent approval. So that at least forces usage of web apps if the kid is trying to bypass some restrictions, which in itself reduces the damage caused by these social networks.
irrational 4y ago
Not if it has a VPN, like circle (which is what we use), installed.
deleted 4y ago
[deleted]

giancarlostoro 4y ago

I would probably try out Discord for yourself if you never have, you can find anything Pihole is likely blocking indirectly via Discord, just saying.

yumraj 4y ago
Ah thank you. Yes, I have never used Discord and don’t know its capacities. I definitely should educate myself :) But the kid is now in senior year of high school so in worst case I did protect them for as long as I could. I won’t have much control from next year anyway..
- giancarlostoro 4y ago
  Fair, I use it all the time, there's probably millions of different communities on it, think of reddit but with the capacity to share files, images, voice chat, video call, screenshare and so on. Now remember how insane reddit can get without all of that. Just wanted to post this in case someone else has no idea and they let their kids on that platform. Chances are high most people on Discord are fine, but bad can be found anywhere online.

nineteen999 4y ago

> I’ve said it before, the difference is that we don’t use any of the social media ourselves You wouldn't classify HN as social media?

beej71 4y ago
I'd say it's a subclass of social media. There's dopamine social media and non-dopamine social media.
- nineteen999 4y ago
  I want to thank you for your socket guides etc. I learnt TCP/IP programming from those way back in the 90's! Presuming I am talking to the correct Beej here of course.
  - beej71 4y ago
    You're welcome! Always good to hear when the guides are used to good effect. :)
yumraj 4y ago
Touché! But, I'm pretty sure the Surgeon General did not have HN in mind while making that comment. :) HN is a social media, but it lacks certain capabilities that make it OK. First and foremost, there is no DM, then it's heavily moderated both by users as well as by DanG, and then it is text based. Also, based on my observation, the karma/like acquisition is not what drives people's comments here. So, while you're correct that it's a social media, it's not the cesspool of poison that the usual ones, that come to mind when we use the term social media, are.
- deleted 4y ago
  [deleted]
irrational 4y ago
I wouldn’t. It’s not social without a social network. A social network implies that we are not all anonymous strangers. It implies we know people’s real names and other personal information about them. To the best of my knowledge, I have never interacted with the same person twice on HN (or Reddit). That’s basically the opposite of social or a network. When everyone is anonymous, and might even be a bot, it isn’t social media. Mostly because it is not social.