5 ms·

How does that work? Is it an ethnicity issue?

yamtaddle 4y ago
Shit I can drop like 3 (relative) points on the good ol' 10 scale just by traveling to different sections of my own city. And while I'm not bad by local standards I'm only like a 2 or a 3 in some cities I've visited. From "not bad" to "uggo" just by traveling to another city, without ethnicity being a factor.
- wonderwonder 4y ago
  how? Honestly I am not doubting you, I have just been married for a very long time so out of the game. Is it a presentation of wealth or dress style?
  - Spooky23 4y ago
    People find their tribes. A few years ago at work we were invaded by an intern army of what we affectionately called “dudebros”. They all had prince Harry style beards and talked about IPAs. By all accounts, the female interns were very polarized by the look.
  - yamtaddle 4y ago
    Largely fitness level and attention to appearance (very-nice well-kept haircuts, probably a little male use of makeup, that kind of thing). Skin care routines (say, consistency of applying sunscreen and wearing hats when outdoors, from early ages on) can vary wildly with local cultural norms and, notably, with class-related socialization, with the result that some cohorts have much nicer skin in middle age than others. Plus I've been in a few cities where, frankly, it just looks like the gene pool's exceptionally good. [EDIT] Oh and stuff like serious hair-loss treatments and plugs and such, and skin blemish removal, short of full-on plastic surgery. I can just about guarantee those are more common in rich areas and richer cities than in poorer areas and poorer cities.
    - wonderwonder 4y ago
      That makes sense, I had never even considered regional based attractiveness. Thanks for taking the time to respond.
  - sangnoir 4y ago
    > how? A small town 8(/10) can be an LA[0] 4 or 5. Then again a small town 10 can also be an LA 10. Samples can be biased in weird ways. 0. If you're fan of the LA aesthetic measures.
    - justinclift 4y ago
      LA?
      - yamtaddle 4y ago
        Los Angeles, California, USA. Or possibly Louisiana, but surely Los Angeles, from context.
      - sangnoir 4y ago
        Los Angeles: 19 million people and home to Hollywood. It's to attractive people[1] what Silicon Valley is to nerds (not saying there isn't an overlap). To be completely honest, I also incorrectly thought LA was America's plastic surgery capital - but it turns out to be Miami. 1. Who want to be in entertainment/acting, but being attractive is almost a prerequisite.
        justinclift 4y ago
        Thanks both. :)
heyheyhey 4y ago
My guess is ethnic male of average height. Attractive in his native country where his ethnicity isn't a factor and the average height is much lower.
- phkahler 4y ago
  As a tall male with some success on the apps, I find women 5'10" or more are much more likely to match me than those who are shorter. They prefer taller men and for a tall woman that reduces my competition. Still contemplating why those apps are so terrible, but the are.
  - slenk 4y ago
    My wife is 5'10" and she said she hated how all the tall guys wanted to date the short girls, leaving the tall girls with shorter guys than them
bmn__ 4y ago
"just be white", bro
- wonderwonder 4y ago
  you present this as some sort of negative? What is wrong with people being attracted to certain races? People cannot control who they find attractive and there is no racist component to it. People should be allowed to engage in relationships with whoever they want using whatever criteria they want.
  - scarmig 4y ago
    There's a tension between the belief espoused by many on this thread that a man struggling dating is purely a matter of him being an unkempt, terrible person and the fact that arbitrary things like race can make dating a struggle.
    - wonderwonder 4y ago
      I can agree that being a minority in a small pond can make things more difficult in regards to dating but I don't think that is anyone's fault or that anything should be done about it. I took the person I responded to as meaning that preferring a certain race or ethnicity is a negative thing. Perhaps I misunderstood their intent.
  - bmn__ 4y ago
    > you present this as some sort of negative? I'm glad that you formulated this as a question. The answer is no, I presented it value neutral, both by intent and expressed written form. Now that GGP has a search term, he might soon find out more about the concept and also might admit it into his mind as real and true, as I once did.
    - wonderwonder 4y ago
      Mentioned in another post but I think I misinterpreted your statement. Based on the search term, this appears to be a concept held by the incel community. Are you positioning it as true and if so, as a solvable problem or just a fact of life?

Shit I can drop like 3 (relative) points on the good ol' 10 scale just by traveling to different sections of my own city. And while I'm not bad by local standards I'm only like a 2 or a 3 in some cities I've visited. From "not bad" to "uggo" just by traveling to another city, without ethnicity being a factor.

wonderwonder 4y ago
how? Honestly I am not doubting you, I have just been married for a very long time so out of the game. Is it a presentation of wealth or dress style?
- Spooky23 4y ago
  People find their tribes. A few years ago at work we were invaded by an intern army of what we affectionately called “dudebros”. They all had prince Harry style beards and talked about IPAs. By all accounts, the female interns were very polarized by the look.
- yamtaddle 4y ago
  Largely fitness level and attention to appearance (very-nice well-kept haircuts, probably a little male use of makeup, that kind of thing). Skin care routines (say, consistency of applying sunscreen and wearing hats when outdoors, from early ages on) can vary wildly with local cultural norms and, notably, with class-related socialization, with the result that some cohorts have much nicer skin in middle age than others. Plus I've been in a few cities where, frankly, it just looks like the gene pool's exceptionally good. [EDIT] Oh and stuff like serious hair-loss treatments and plugs and such, and skin blemish removal, short of full-on plastic surgery. I can just about guarantee those are more common in rich areas and richer cities than in poorer areas and poorer cities.
  - wonderwonder 4y ago
    That makes sense, I had never even considered regional based attractiveness. Thanks for taking the time to respond.
- sangnoir 4y ago
  > how? A small town 8(/10) can be an LA[0] 4 or 5. Then again a small town 10 can also be an LA 10. Samples can be biased in weird ways. 0. If you're fan of the LA aesthetic measures.
  - justinclift 4y ago
    LA?
    - yamtaddle 4y ago
      Los Angeles, California, USA. Or possibly Louisiana, but surely Los Angeles, from context.
    - sangnoir 4y ago
      Los Angeles: 19 million people and home to Hollywood. It's to attractive people[1] what Silicon Valley is to nerds (not saying there isn't an overlap). To be completely honest, I also incorrectly thought LA was America's plastic surgery capital - but it turns out to be Miami. 1. Who want to be in entertainment/acting, but being attractive is almost a prerequisite.
      - justinclift 4y ago
        Thanks both. :)

heyheyhey 4y ago

My guess is ethnic male of average height. Attractive in his native country where his ethnicity isn't a factor and the average height is much lower.

phkahler 4y ago
As a tall male with some success on the apps, I find women 5'10" or more are much more likely to match me than those who are shorter. They prefer taller men and for a tall woman that reduces my competition. Still contemplating why those apps are so terrible, but the are.
- slenk 4y ago
  My wife is 5'10" and she said she hated how all the tall guys wanted to date the short girls, leaving the tall girls with shorter guys than them

bmn__ 4y ago

"just be white", bro

wonderwonder 4y ago
you present this as some sort of negative? What is wrong with people being attracted to certain races? People cannot control who they find attractive and there is no racist component to it. People should be allowed to engage in relationships with whoever they want using whatever criteria they want.
- scarmig 4y ago
  There's a tension between the belief espoused by many on this thread that a man struggling dating is purely a matter of him being an unkempt, terrible person and the fact that arbitrary things like race can make dating a struggle.
  - wonderwonder 4y ago
    I can agree that being a minority in a small pond can make things more difficult in regards to dating but I don't think that is anyone's fault or that anything should be done about it. I took the person I responded to as meaning that preferring a certain race or ethnicity is a negative thing. Perhaps I misunderstood their intent.
- bmn__ 4y ago
  > you present this as some sort of negative? I'm glad that you formulated this as a question. The answer is no, I presented it value neutral, both by intent and expressed written form. Now that GGP has a search term, he might soon find out more about the concept and also might admit it into his mind as real and true, as I once did.
  - wonderwonder 4y ago
    Mentioned in another post but I think I misinterpreted your statement. Based on the search term, this appears to be a concept held by the incel community. Are you positioning it as true and if so, as a solvable problem or just a fact of life?