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Old joke time: Patient: Doctor I want to live to 100! Dr: First stop smoking Patient: Ok I can do that Dr: Next stop eating red meat Patient: Sure, that to
by jahnu 4y ago
Old joke time:
Patient: Doctor I want to live to 100!
Dr: First stop smoking
Patient: Ok I can do that
Dr: Next stop eating red meat
Patient: Sure, that too
Dr: No more alcohol
Patient getting uncomfortable: Ok ok fine
Dr: Go to bed early and get 8-9 hours uninterrupted sleep
Patient: hmm
Dr: And finally, cut out sugar, don't eat so much and do a lot more excercise
Patient: Ok ok ok, and will I then live to 100?
Dr: Eh... probably not but, it will feel like it.
- ye-olde-sysrq 4y agoThat's great. I heard a similar one: A man is concerned about his health and longevity, so he visits his doctor. Man: "Doctor, I am concerned about dying before my time. Am I okay?" Doctor: "Do you smoke?" Man: "No" Doctor: "Do you drink wine or beer?" Man: "No" Doctor: "Do you stay up late?" Man: "No" Doctor: "Do you eat rare red meat?" Man: "No" Doctor: "Do you have sex with many partners?" Man: "No" Doctor: "Then why the fuck do you care?"
- ClapperHeid 4y agoOr yet another version... OLD MAN: Look at me, son. I don't moke. I don't drink. I don't take drugs. I don't eat fatty food. I don't chase after women. And tomorrow I celebrate my hundredth birthday! YOUNG MAN: How?
- latchkey 4y agoHe (almost) literally wrote this as a blog post... https://www.bryanjohnson.co/articles/i-fired-myself https://www.bryanjohnson.co/articles/i-fired-myself