3 ms·

> - Looming over your shoulder while you enter the tip I'm with you on the rest, but I find this one dramatically exaggerated by a certain type of person. If y

> - Looming over your shoulder while you enter the tip I'm with you on the rest, but I find this one dramatically exaggerated by a certain type of person. If you're paying by card, the server is going to be around, waiting for you to finish so they can give you a copy of the receipt. I find that there is a certain type of person will always describe this as "looming" or "guilted" or feel "social pressure". Your feelings are legitimate, but the logic behind them is not. While there is definitely pressure to tip (and tip more and more), I've never met a server who would actually act in any way outwardly disappointed by 1) tip of 15%, 2) no tip on takeout, 3) no tip on counter service. While some people will say "you SHOULD tip 20%" (or more), the actual staff will consider anything beyond the old standard bonus.

shostack 4y ago
You should avoid characterizing someone as "a certain type of person." Especially an internet stranger that you do not know in the least. I have encountered plenty of servers who hand you the card reader, step back, turn around, whatever, then take it when you're done and walk away. Zero issues. That has been fine. I have likewise encountered overly pushy servers, often those who knew they did a less than stellar job, who literally stood over my shoulder looking at the screen, pointing over my shoulder saying "and here's where you can enter the tip." That sure as hell is creating a sense of "looming" and "guilt" and "social pressure" (if not physical pressure). I've likewise encountered servers who deliver less than stellar service who complained quite vocally when I dared to leave a 15% tip (they should probably have received 0%). Don't mistake your personal experiences for those of others. Don't presume how you feel about social encounters is how others should feel or shame them when they don't align with your world view.

shostack 4y ago

You should avoid characterizing someone as "a certain type of person." Especially an internet stranger that you do not know in the least. I have encountered plenty of servers who hand you the card reader, step back, turn around, whatever, then take it when you're done and walk away. Zero issues. That has been fine. I have likewise encountered overly pushy servers, often those who knew they did a less than stellar job, who literally stood over my shoulder looking at the screen, pointing over my shoulder saying "and here's where you can enter the tip." That sure as hell is creating a sense of "looming" and "guilt" and "social pressure" (if not physical pressure). I've likewise encountered servers who deliver less than stellar service who complained quite vocally when I dared to leave a 15% tip (they should probably have received 0%). Don't mistake your personal experiences for those of others. Don't presume how you feel about social encounters is how others should feel or shame them when they don't align with your world view.