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Ask 'em why they don't. Something like this: ---- Inner Critic: This is bullshit. I do not love and accept myself exactly as I am. You: What's missing? Inne
by egypturnash 4y ago
Ask 'em why they don't. Something like this:
----
Inner Critic: This is bullshit. I do not love and accept myself exactly as I am.
You: What's missing?
Inner Critic: I'm out of shape, I live alone, and I make two cents out of every dollar I make for my boss.
You: Yeah, those all suck. Damn. What can we do about these things?
Inner Critic: Man I dunno, I just know this sucks.
Inner Manic Pixie Dream Girl: Hey, remember that broadsword club that meets in the park every Saturday? We could start doing that again, it's free, and it's an hour or so waving a heavy thing around with a bunch of other people, some of whom you know damn well have better jobs than us and could end up being a valuable connection if we end up as friends, some of whom might also turn out to be potential housemates, friends, or lovers. No promises of anything beyond "getting in better shape" but that's certainly more opportunities for something to happen.
- smugglerFlynn 4y agoWord of caution is that such '5 Why' trains of questions might not dig out the real reason, and will steer you away from the actual problem. Oftentimes inner critic reacts[0] to strong emotions in the present, trying to validate, "fix" or rationalise them, purely because you are not used to working with such strong emotions -- this could be due to upbringing, emotional neglect and some other reasons. Critic might not be logical at all. Referenced is an excellent book[0] from a clinical psychologist that has many detailed strategies to dig out the reasons behind critical thoughts and properly reframe them. 0 - Self-Esteem by Matthew McKay; https://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Cognitive-Techniques-Assessing-Maintaining/dp/1626253935 https://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Cognitive-Techniques-Asse...