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I hate crypto because it had all the hallmarks of the fantasy futurism we read about in so many countless spellbound novels of sci-fi and wonder, but turned out

I hate crypto because it had all the hallmarks of the fantasy futurism we read about in so many countless spellbound novels of sci-fi and wonder, but turned out to be an exhausting dichotomy of ponzi-scheme money laundering or regulatory shuck-and-jive bureaucratic hell. Its all-singing, all-dancing soulless cavalcade begat such horrorshows as the crypto.com sports arena, the FTX arena, and the desperate attempt by local government to disjoin itself from the nightmare of toxic branding or brace white-knuckled for a slow motion collapse to sweep their hastily cashed branding rights cheque into the dustbin of decisions that make the entire state look worse for existing. It also spawned things like the absolutely enigmatic "bitcoin ATM" found at only the seediest smoke shops and derelict drug stores. does it vend Bitcoin? is that giant coin with a B on it festooned in bright advertisement on the side a bitcoin? Why does it look like the lovechild of an 80s ATM and an airport check-in kiosk? The only thing this machine reliably did was ensure the freezer next to it was harder to open if you wanted to get a choco-taco. Dont get me started on the near dystopian comedy of KYC and so many hours spent snapping photos of yourself with a hand-written paper sign for Kraken to verify, or fiat conversions that for some reason cant involve your bank unless you will it to some third party swedish fintech nobody has heard of but will probably never remember once their founders yacht is found smouldering off the caymans. And the bros...so many crypto bros. Is crypto an investment? sure. is it good smart financial sense? of course! can it deworm the dog and start my old Ford? buddy, its crypto and these nonsense peddling talking heads are about to waste your entire lunch reminding you that no matter how volatile the coin, no matter how hair-brained the leadership, and no matter how laughable the mascot, we'll all be rich by the end of the year and you have $wondercoin to thank for it. just dont ask them how blockchain actually works...it works and it aughta be used for everything

the_snooze 4y ago
>And the bros...so many crypto bros. Is crypto an investment? sure. is it good smart financial sense? of course! can it deworm the dog and start my old Ford? buddy, its crypto and these nonsense peddling talking heads are about to waste your entire lunch reminding you that no matter how volatile the coin, no matter how hair-brained the leadership, and no matter how laughable the mascot, we'll all be rich by the end of the year and you have $wondercoin to thank for it. just dont ask them how blockchain actually works...it works and it aughta be used for everything It's a solution for everything! That's how you know little thought actually went into understanding any of the problems it purports to solve, or any of the people who have real problems that need to be addressed. I love how crypto-bros keep referring to the "early days" of the internet to excuse crypto's lack of practical application. I'm like, dude, even ARPANET had an easy-to-understand use case: share data and compute resources across various laboratories. It knew who and what it was for. Who is crypto for, exactly?
- kliao 4y ago
  https://astralcodexten.substack.com/p/why-im-less-than-infinitely-hostile https://astralcodexten.substack.com/p/why-im-less-than-infin... Reliable money transfer in nations with under-developed banking systems is a clear use case for crypto.
  - notch656c 4y ago
    Try buying bullion online in US in a way where payment clears in under an hour without crypto. The main other option is debit/credit and bullion vendors usually charge much higher premiums for those methods.
    - rippercushions 4y ago
      Clearly this is just waiting for somebody to combine gold and crypto! Oh wait, they already tried that: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E-gold https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E-gold
      - TheCondor 4y ago
        Was that a crypto play? Or just a variation on paypal? I only ever remember really seedy operations using e-gold as a payment. Online drugs (street drugs) and things like that.
        rippercushions 4y ago
        It was the first major digital currency play, but it was not blockchain-based and thus technically not a cryptocurrency. It was, however, a useful sneak preview of most everything we've seen play out since in the crypto space: money laundering, hacks, criminal prosecutions etc.
    - woodruffw 4y ago
      The fact that goldbugs charge each other premiums for not paying in gold (or what they perceive to be digital gold) is not to my estimation a strong argument for cryptocurrencies.
technion 4y ago
I hate that it's ruined social events. I routinely get tracked down because "you're in tech, so you must be into this", and lose a relaxing evening to trying to get rid of some guy who wants to help me understand that Global Warming was invented to make crypto look bad, how having a credit card in your wallet makes you a corporate bootlicker, and some sort of anti-Semitic argument about who controls banking. It's exhausting, I'd rather go to a restaurant on my own.
- robocat 4y ago
  Perhaps you need some help on how to discourage them. Maybe ask a model how they get rid of unwanted attention? So, someone expects you to be techy: start a monologue on the Byzantine General's problem and how it relates to database design choices. Create your own geeky obsession on the topic of the mating habits of spiders (which is actually extremely interesting, so use with care). Make it a fun game for yourself and your friends, to find the most effective one-sentence blockers?! "Would you be interested in a business opportunity in Amway? (in excited tones)" Use the opportunity to learn the soft art of getting people to leave you alone. Unwanted attention can come from any direction in your future too.
stephenboyd 4y ago
I've been a crypto skeptic for most of the past decade. I especially hate the industry, the overhyped blockchain-magic ideology, and the ubiquitous scams. But I remember when I was a CS student and Bitcoin was a new thing. I thought it was a cool concept and I love the romantic idea of underground digital pirate math money. It's still a neat technology (though blockchains are still wrong for 99.9% of DB use cases). But now it's just one of the worst parts of the mainstream financial establishment.
scotty79 4y ago
> exhausting dichotomy of ponzi-scheme money laundering or regulatory shuck-and-jive bureaucratic hell. Read up on how banks are creating money these days. Suddenly something like Bitcoin begins to seem like a completely reasonable way to do money. And all other crypto still seem like they are just chasing the creativity of normal banks.
- paulryanrogers 4y ago
  Because some banks are laundering risk you propose that we instead use a system that requires as much energy as medium sized countries to achieve 7 transactions per second? And in the midst of an energy crisis?
- spiralx 4y ago
  There's nothing stopping exchanges from operating a fractional reserve system, and all of the ones that have collapsed pretty much did so.

the_snooze 4y ago

>And the bros...so many crypto bros. Is crypto an investment? sure. is it good smart financial sense? of course! can it deworm the dog and start my old Ford? buddy, its crypto and these nonsense peddling talking heads are about to waste your entire lunch reminding you that no matter how volatile the coin, no matter how hair-brained the leadership, and no matter how laughable the mascot, we'll all be rich by the end of the year and you have $wondercoin to thank for it. just dont ask them how blockchain actually works...it works and it aughta be used for everything It's a solution for everything! That's how you know little thought actually went into understanding any of the problems it purports to solve, or any of the people who have real problems that need to be addressed. I love how crypto-bros keep referring to the "early days" of the internet to excuse crypto's lack of practical application. I'm like, dude, even ARPANET had an easy-to-understand use case: share data and compute resources across various laboratories. It knew who and what it was for. Who is crypto for, exactly?

kliao 4y ago
https://astralcodexten.substack.com/p/why-im-less-than-infinitely-hostile https://astralcodexten.substack.com/p/why-im-less-than-infin... Reliable money transfer in nations with under-developed banking systems is a clear use case for crypto.
- notch656c 4y ago
  Try buying bullion online in US in a way where payment clears in under an hour without crypto. The main other option is debit/credit and bullion vendors usually charge much higher premiums for those methods.
  - rippercushions 4y ago
    Clearly this is just waiting for somebody to combine gold and crypto! Oh wait, they already tried that: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E-gold https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E-gold
    - TheCondor 4y ago
      Was that a crypto play? Or just a variation on paypal? I only ever remember really seedy operations using e-gold as a payment. Online drugs (street drugs) and things like that.
      - rippercushions 4y ago
        It was the first major digital currency play, but it was not blockchain-based and thus technically not a cryptocurrency. It was, however, a useful sneak preview of most everything we've seen play out since in the crypto space: money laundering, hacks, criminal prosecutions etc.
  - woodruffw 4y ago
    The fact that goldbugs charge each other premiums for not paying in gold (or what they perceive to be digital gold) is not to my estimation a strong argument for cryptocurrencies.

technion 4y ago

I hate that it's ruined social events. I routinely get tracked down because "you're in tech, so you must be into this", and lose a relaxing evening to trying to get rid of some guy who wants to help me understand that Global Warming was invented to make crypto look bad, how having a credit card in your wallet makes you a corporate bootlicker, and some sort of anti-Semitic argument about who controls banking. It's exhausting, I'd rather go to a restaurant on my own.

robocat 4y ago
Perhaps you need some help on how to discourage them. Maybe ask a model how they get rid of unwanted attention? So, someone expects you to be techy: start a monologue on the Byzantine General's problem and how it relates to database design choices. Create your own geeky obsession on the topic of the mating habits of spiders (which is actually extremely interesting, so use with care). Make it a fun game for yourself and your friends, to find the most effective one-sentence blockers?! "Would you be interested in a business opportunity in Amway? (in excited tones)" Use the opportunity to learn the soft art of getting people to leave you alone. Unwanted attention can come from any direction in your future too.

stephenboyd 4y ago

I've been a crypto skeptic for most of the past decade. I especially hate the industry, the overhyped blockchain-magic ideology, and the ubiquitous scams. But I remember when I was a CS student and Bitcoin was a new thing. I thought it was a cool concept and I love the romantic idea of underground digital pirate math money. It's still a neat technology (though blockchains are still wrong for 99.9% of DB use cases). But now it's just one of the worst parts of the mainstream financial establishment.

scotty79 4y ago

> exhausting dichotomy of ponzi-scheme money laundering or regulatory shuck-and-jive bureaucratic hell. Read up on how banks are creating money these days. Suddenly something like Bitcoin begins to seem like a completely reasonable way to do money. And all other crypto still seem like they are just chasing the creativity of normal banks.

paulryanrogers 4y ago
Because some banks are laundering risk you propose that we instead use a system that requires as much energy as medium sized countries to achieve 7 transactions per second? And in the midst of an energy crisis?
spiralx 4y ago
There's nothing stopping exchanges from operating a fractional reserve system, and all of the ones that have collapsed pretty much did so.