4 ms·

Unless you've actually lived through it yourself, you yourself don't understand so there's no chance to instill this in your children. It would be akin to tryi

Unless you've actually lived through it yourself, you yourself don't understand so there's no chance to instill this in your children. It would be akin to trying to get an extremely wealthy child to understand the experience of using a washing machine for years on end when they've never even seen one because the help does all of that for them. Or the reverse, to get a middle class child to understand what it's like to have never even seen a washing machine because you have other humans who do it all for you. It's the human condition. But what you're doing is performative in the same way that screaming at people on twitter rather than actually working to help child abuse victims is performative. It's a way to assuage your feelings of guilt without expending enough of yourself to attempt to improve others' lives. --- On a side note, I'm aware HN is a "safe space" for folks like yourself, but sometimes it needs to be said. Perspective is a hell of a drug and often when I see posts like this it gets my gander up as someone who went from extreme poverty to privilege. And to answer the question that's coming, I'm known to be extremely charitable to _persons_ who need it, but I don't go out of my way to solve the general problem either. But the difference is I have no illusions about it.

jedberg 4y ago
Well first off I have the perspective and did live through it, so there's that. But also, why do people assume others can't have empathy? I don't have to touch a hot stove to know it hurts. I don't need to live in poverty to understand how difficult it is. Growing up Jewish I have been discriminated against, but I don't assume anyone who isn't Jewish can't understand my discrimination. It sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder, or perhaps guilt for getting out of your situation. You shouldn't. You should be proud of your accomplishments. But you should also give people the benefit of the doubt that they can actually have empathy even if they haven't lived it.
- tjrDL6MjB2Zwwa 4y ago
  > I don't have to touch a hot stove to know it hurts. You do need to touch a hot stove to understand what a burn feels like, just as you need to actually deliver a baby to understand what that feels like. "It hurts" is not understanding in the same way that I'll never truly understand what an orgasm feels like for a woman (and vice versa for them). I've read it starts in the stomach and moves upwards through the body until it climaxes in the head, but who knows if that's actually true. Certainly for me it doesn't feel that way. Here's the question you have to answer. If you're walking by a drain that has a dozen chicks trapped in it but do nothing outside of recognize their plight, are you a good person for having recognized or a bad person for that recognition not being a call to action? _THAT_ is the basic moral quandry you're up against and I'm pointing out that not only is your solution wrong, you're trying to convince others you're moral rather than just neutral.

jedberg 4y ago

Well first off I have the perspective and did live through it, so there's that. But also, why do people assume others can't have empathy? I don't have to touch a hot stove to know it hurts. I don't need to live in poverty to understand how difficult it is. Growing up Jewish I have been discriminated against, but I don't assume anyone who isn't Jewish can't understand my discrimination. It sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder, or perhaps guilt for getting out of your situation. You shouldn't. You should be proud of your accomplishments. But you should also give people the benefit of the doubt that they can actually have empathy even if they haven't lived it.

tjrDL6MjB2Zwwa 4y ago
> I don't have to touch a hot stove to know it hurts. You do need to touch a hot stove to understand what a burn feels like, just as you need to actually deliver a baby to understand what that feels like. "It hurts" is not understanding in the same way that I'll never truly understand what an orgasm feels like for a woman (and vice versa for them). I've read it starts in the stomach and moves upwards through the body until it climaxes in the head, but who knows if that's actually true. Certainly for me it doesn't feel that way. Here's the question you have to answer. If you're walking by a drain that has a dozen chicks trapped in it but do nothing outside of recognize their plight, are you a good person for having recognized or a bad person for that recognition not being a call to action? _THAT_ is the basic moral quandry you're up against and I'm pointing out that not only is your solution wrong, you're trying to convince others you're moral rather than just neutral.