4 ms·

I'm confused why it matters how you're referred to in the third person. I'm not trying to be snarky: but you're not there if you're being talked about in the

I'm confused why it matters how you're referred to in the third person. I'm not trying to be snarky: but you're not there if you're being talked about in the third person (like a police report or a newspaper article), and if you're there, they will use the English "you" which is gender neutral.

wpietri 4y ago
I'm confused that you're confused. You're never referred to in the third person, either when present or absent? Or if you are, do you not care at all what pronoun they use for you?
- mancerayder 4y ago
  Correct, it's never come up in my life, although I've heard 'ma am' awkwardly on the phone once or twice. It's hardly worth losing sleep over much less adding pronouns to user profiles. It's better off optional for those who want the message to be seen that it's important to them.
  - wpietri 4y ago
    I find this hard to believe assuming we're talking about English here. Yesterday in a meeting somebody referred to me with a pronoun while speaking to the group. And I'm confident that other people use pronouns about me pretty regularly, in that I do that frequently about them. If you're saying you personally don't care what gender you get referred to as, that's your right. But for other people getting misgendered can be a significant problem. If you want to change that, it's not those people you need to get to change. It's the ones making such a big deal about other people's gender.
    - mancerayder 4y ago
      First of all the world of online is different than the real world, where there's no parentheses or tags floating next to you. Meaning new people you've just met in a meeting, say, have no idea what the pronouns are. If they're out of the norm then it may make sense to mention it then, I don't think society is hostile to it. I believe it applies to less than one percent of the US population, so it seems excessive to establish a norm of behavior for all, since harmony seems achievable despite that.

wpietri 4y ago

I'm confused that you're confused. You're never referred to in the third person, either when present or absent? Or if you are, do you not care at all what pronoun they use for you?

mancerayder 4y ago
Correct, it's never come up in my life, although I've heard 'ma am' awkwardly on the phone once or twice. It's hardly worth losing sleep over much less adding pronouns to user profiles. It's better off optional for those who want the message to be seen that it's important to them.
- wpietri 4y ago
  I find this hard to believe assuming we're talking about English here. Yesterday in a meeting somebody referred to me with a pronoun while speaking to the group. And I'm confident that other people use pronouns about me pretty regularly, in that I do that frequently about them. If you're saying you personally don't care what gender you get referred to as, that's your right. But for other people getting misgendered can be a significant problem. If you want to change that, it's not those people you need to get to change. It's the ones making such a big deal about other people's gender.
  - mancerayder 4y ago
    First of all the world of online is different than the real world, where there's no parentheses or tags floating next to you. Meaning new people you've just met in a meeting, say, have no idea what the pronouns are. If they're out of the norm then it may make sense to mention it then, I don't think society is hostile to it. I believe it applies to less than one percent of the US population, so it seems excessive to establish a norm of behavior for all, since harmony seems achievable despite that.