To expand on 1, it does not have to mean that one has not thought about the subject. It can also mean that one has thought about the subject in depth but has ei

To expand on 1, it does not have to mean that one has not thought about the subject. It can also mean that one has thought about the subject in depth but has either reached a dead end or has reached a undesirable answer. Since this is about kids, plenty of people would desire having children from an emotional POV, yet would find it a bad choice for various rational reasons. Such people are in a deadlock and to an outsider would appear as not know what they want.