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> As we age, we usually end up with more and more life responsibilities As somebody who far away from 40, how is one supposed to "look forward" to getting olde

> As we age, we usually end up with more and more life responsibilities As somebody who far away from 40, how is one supposed to "look forward" to getting older given this likelihood?

SnaggyJoker 4y ago
Pretty sure nobody looks forward to getting older except for the young. People plan towards retirement which is usually just looking forwards to not having to work anymore. People look forward to having children and grand children. I don't know anyone who looks forward to getting older except for the young.
cstever 4y ago
More life responsibilities isn't a bad thing. Life is (or should be) made of intentional decisions by the user (you). And the culmination of these intentional decisions can fill your life with meaning, purpose, and fulfillment. You don't have to take Responsibility A if you don't want to, but you have to live with the consequences of your decision (good or bad). It's a trade off. I want a house. I make that decision for that responsibility. I now own that responsibility knowing the duties that come with home ownership will take a portion of my time and therefore will reduce the availability of time once given to a different responsibility. Of course, mistakes will be made, but the best part is you can most often correct mistakes in healthy and meaningful ways.
bboygravity 4y ago
Those life responsibilities are not mandatory unavoidable things. They're choices. Such as: owning property, owning car(s), having children, getting married, getting a mortgage, etc. You can chose to not do any of those things and basically live like you're 20 when you're 80 (in terms of responsibilities).
- alex_suzuki 4y ago
  As someone who has done all the things you listed, my experience is that the grass is always greener on the other side.
WhiteBlueSkies 4y ago
They are first world problems and if you read carefully everyone who has gotten responsibilities chose them and they are very happy for it. It's just the mind's way of coming up with problems when there aren't any.
- MuffinFlavored 4y ago
  It just feels like you gradually "give up" a life that was once yours (less responsibilities) and are "slowly forced" into a life that isn't as much yours (get married, buy a house, have children).
  - WhiteBlueSkies 4y ago
    Doesn't "slowly forced" imply lack of agency?
    - MuffinFlavored 4y ago
      > sense of agency refers to the feeling of control over actions and their consequences. You're damned if you do (give up control) damned if you don't (walk through life unmarried with no kids in an apartment wondering what could've been)
fullshark 4y ago
Without responsibilities your life has no stakes, and no rewards.
notyourwork 4y ago
By enjoying today, tomorrow will come regardless of whether you want to avoid getting older. Best you can do is prepare for tomorrow, health and finances.
xyproto 4y ago
Life is more fulfilling, but with more responsibility comes more things to worry about.
sowbug 4y ago
Everyone says "I'm not as quick as I was when I was younger, but I have more experience." But that's a very sad kind of survivor bias. You were born with your quickness, but you have to earn the experience. Not everyone ends up middle-aged with useful experience. You hear only from the ones who do. And nobody has a time machine. So look forward to reaping the benefit of experience, but let that be a warning that experience doesn't happen for free. Use your youth to acquire as many lifelong skills as possible. Use those skills in challenging ways to develop judgment. Use your skills and judgment to develop meaningful relationships with people who have chosen similar strategies. Being able to offer solid skills, judgment, and relationships, rather than the ability to work consecutive 18-hour days, is what you'll have to look forward to.

> As we age, we usually end up with more and more life responsibilities As somebody who far away from 40, how is one supposed to "look forward" to getting older given this likelihood?

SnaggyJoker 4y ago

Pretty sure nobody looks forward to getting older except for the young. People plan towards retirement which is usually just looking forwards to not having to work anymore. People look forward to having children and grand children. I don't know anyone who looks forward to getting older except for the young.

cstever 4y ago

More life responsibilities isn't a bad thing. Life is (or should be) made of intentional decisions by the user (you). And the culmination of these intentional decisions can fill your life with meaning, purpose, and fulfillment. You don't have to take Responsibility A if you don't want to, but you have to live with the consequences of your decision (good or bad). It's a trade off. I want a house. I make that decision for that responsibility. I now own that responsibility knowing the duties that come with home ownership will take a portion of my time and therefore will reduce the availability of time once given to a different responsibility. Of course, mistakes will be made, but the best part is you can most often correct mistakes in healthy and meaningful ways.

bboygravity 4y ago

Those life responsibilities are not mandatory unavoidable things. They're choices. Such as: owning property, owning car(s), having children, getting married, getting a mortgage, etc. You can chose to not do any of those things and basically live like you're 20 when you're 80 (in terms of responsibilities).

alex_suzuki 4y ago
As someone who has done all the things you listed, my experience is that the grass is always greener on the other side.

WhiteBlueSkies 4y ago

They are first world problems and if you read carefully everyone who has gotten responsibilities chose them and they are very happy for it. It's just the mind's way of coming up with problems when there aren't any.

MuffinFlavored 4y ago
It just feels like you gradually "give up" a life that was once yours (less responsibilities) and are "slowly forced" into a life that isn't as much yours (get married, buy a house, have children).
- WhiteBlueSkies 4y ago
  Doesn't "slowly forced" imply lack of agency?
  - MuffinFlavored 4y ago
    > sense of agency refers to the feeling of control over actions and their consequences. You're damned if you do (give up control) damned if you don't (walk through life unmarried with no kids in an apartment wondering what could've been)

fullshark 4y ago

Without responsibilities your life has no stakes, and no rewards.

notyourwork 4y ago

By enjoying today, tomorrow will come regardless of whether you want to avoid getting older. Best you can do is prepare for tomorrow, health and finances.

xyproto 4y ago

Life is more fulfilling, but with more responsibility comes more things to worry about.

sowbug 4y ago

Everyone says "I'm not as quick as I was when I was younger, but I have more experience." But that's a very sad kind of survivor bias. You were born with your quickness, but you have to earn the experience. Not everyone ends up middle-aged with useful experience. You hear only from the ones who do. And nobody has a time machine. So look forward to reaping the benefit of experience, but let that be a warning that experience doesn't happen for free. Use your youth to acquire as many lifelong skills as possible. Use those skills in challenging ways to develop judgment. Use your skills and judgment to develop meaningful relationships with people who have chosen similar strategies. Being able to offer solid skills, judgment, and relationships, rather than the ability to work consecutive 18-hour days, is what you'll have to look forward to.