8 ms·

Instead of rewarding the antisocial behavior and therefore causing it to happen more frequently, albeit to other people, I would recommend one of these: - "I'm

Instead of rewarding the antisocial behavior and therefore causing it to happen more frequently, albeit to other people, I would recommend one of these: - "I'm sorry but I've lost my job. I cannot afford this." - "I'm sorry but no means no." - If they insist: "Which part of the two letters in 'No' do you not understand?" You aren't the jerk. Someone who doesn't accept "no" is the jerk. There's places to go to to lend money, they're called banks. If you're not a bank it's not your job.

giraffe_lady 4y ago
Nothing is your job except your job, but how impoverished would your life, family and your community be if everyone stuck to strictly that? You might be right on the specifics in this case, I'll abstain from making judgement. But as a guideline, as a framework, "it's not your job" is monstrously insufficient.
- RjQoLCOSwiIKfpm 4y ago
  We're talking primarily about people who don't pay their debts here. There's no loss to my life if these people remove themselves from it. They're thieves in disguise, nothing more. No value is lost if they leave. And in fact, because money is stored time, my life becomes MORE if they leave, because I lose less of the time of my life to them.
  - giraffe_lady 4y ago
    grim way to think of people but ok have fun
    - RjQoLCOSwiIKfpm 4y ago
      It's the view of someone who has lost over $10k to "I'll pay it back!!!" people - they haven't payed back in 10 years now. And they left behind truckloads of trash. How much have you lost to those? I would speculate once you get to a sum this significant your perspective would change ;)
      - giraffe_lady 4y ago
        If someone asks me for money I make it clear they aren't obligated to pay it back at all or in full. In this way I have never "lost" money only given it away. Well over $10k in any year I was adequately employed. Less in others but still tens of dollars here and there even when I was homeless. It's never been hard to find people who seem more in need of it than I am.
        RjQoLCOSwiIKfpm 4y ago
        'If there is a fire hazard in my house, I simply burn it down myself. In this way I have never "lost" a house due to a fire hazard.'
      - fragmede 4y ago
        I've loaned out way more than $10k over the course of my life, but this is the oppression of growing up poor. If you grew up rich, you didn't have friends or uncles or aunt's constantly asking for money and never paying it back so parent poster's mindset seems dramatic/extreme. It is not.

giraffe_lady 4y ago

Nothing is your job except your job, but how impoverished would your life, family and your community be if everyone stuck to strictly that? You might be right on the specifics in this case, I'll abstain from making judgement. But as a guideline, as a framework, "it's not your job" is monstrously insufficient.

RjQoLCOSwiIKfpm 4y ago
We're talking primarily about people who don't pay their debts here. There's no loss to my life if these people remove themselves from it. They're thieves in disguise, nothing more. No value is lost if they leave. And in fact, because money is stored time, my life becomes MORE if they leave, because I lose less of the time of my life to them.
- giraffe_lady 4y ago
  grim way to think of people but ok have fun
  - RjQoLCOSwiIKfpm 4y ago
    It's the view of someone who has lost over $10k to "I'll pay it back!!!" people - they haven't payed back in 10 years now. And they left behind truckloads of trash. How much have you lost to those? I would speculate once you get to a sum this significant your perspective would change ;)
    - giraffe_lady 4y ago
      If someone asks me for money I make it clear they aren't obligated to pay it back at all or in full. In this way I have never "lost" money only given it away. Well over $10k in any year I was adequately employed. Less in others but still tens of dollars here and there even when I was homeless. It's never been hard to find people who seem more in need of it than I am.
      - RjQoLCOSwiIKfpm 4y ago
        'If there is a fire hazard in my house, I simply burn it down myself. In this way I have never "lost" a house due to a fire hazard.'
    - fragmede 4y ago
      I've loaned out way more than $10k over the course of my life, but this is the oppression of growing up poor. If you grew up rich, you didn't have friends or uncles or aunt's constantly asking for money and never paying it back so parent poster's mindset seems dramatic/extreme. It is not.