3 ms·

Off the top of my head, I can think of a half dozen people I've known who are just horrible all of the time. Nasty to their family, nasty to coworkers, nasty t

Off the top of my head, I can think of a half dozen people I've known who are just horrible all of the time. Nasty to their family, nasty to coworkers, nasty to strangers. I can think of another half dozen who are just in the habit of mistreating service workers. Some people you're just catching on a bad day, but there is definitely a portion of the population that are just crappy people.

switchbak 4y ago
Disagreeable personalities are definitely a thing, and some have some other stuff stacked on top that can make for persistently unreasonable people. Off the top of my head I knew someone who had a really hard loss that they couldn't cope with, and you could basically just see them reeling it in all the time, and that was expressed outwardly as anger. Really tragic situation though, and if you didn't know the details you'd just assume they're a raging prick. I find it hard to mine compassion when I don't know someone's backstory, and I usually default to filling in the details with some kind of dismissive story about them just being self centered and belligerent (probably true some of the time though). I find life goes better when I try to fill in the blanks with some kind of reasoning that would explain that behaviour better (while still not excusing it).
- nullsense 4y ago
  >Disagreeable personalities are definitely a thing, and some have some other stuff stacked on top that can make for persistently unreasonable people. I score in the bottom 3rd percentile for trait agreeableness. I'm mostly polite unless perhaps I know something is not right and someone is trying to pull a fast one. I can totally see how low agreeableness combined with being towards the lower end of the distribution on intelligence would make a default strategy of loudly saying your piece and being too dense to a) know you shouldn't do that, b) consider your lack of understanding might be the root of the problem and c) comprehend the implications of what you're being told so that you can calm the heck down. I really feel for those people.

switchbak 4y ago

Disagreeable personalities are definitely a thing, and some have some other stuff stacked on top that can make for persistently unreasonable people. Off the top of my head I knew someone who had a really hard loss that they couldn't cope with, and you could basically just see them reeling it in all the time, and that was expressed outwardly as anger. Really tragic situation though, and if you didn't know the details you'd just assume they're a raging prick. I find it hard to mine compassion when I don't know someone's backstory, and I usually default to filling in the details with some kind of dismissive story about them just being self centered and belligerent (probably true some of the time though). I find life goes better when I try to fill in the blanks with some kind of reasoning that would explain that behaviour better (while still not excusing it).

nullsense 4y ago
>Disagreeable personalities are definitely a thing, and some have some other stuff stacked on top that can make for persistently unreasonable people. I score in the bottom 3rd percentile for trait agreeableness. I'm mostly polite unless perhaps I know something is not right and someone is trying to pull a fast one. I can totally see how low agreeableness combined with being towards the lower end of the distribution on intelligence would make a default strategy of loudly saying your piece and being too dense to a) know you shouldn't do that, b) consider your lack of understanding might be the root of the problem and c) comprehend the implications of what you're being told so that you can calm the heck down. I really feel for those people.