4 ms·

This is just wonderful. I'm so glad that your wife has something to keep her going on her bad days. My wife passed away at 46 years old, and the years leading u

This is just wonderful. I'm so glad that your wife has something to keep her going on her bad days. My wife passed away at 46 years old, and the years leading up to her death were very hard. I learned that sometimes it's the smallest things that really bring joy- not things. Interacting with nature whether by observation or active participation is a wonderful thing.

austinjp 4y ago
A comment like this shouldn't go without a reply. Saying "sorry for your loss" always seems inadequate, so here's a brief recollection instead. A few months ago, in one of the covid lock downs when social distancing was a thing, I was walking in a park. About 200 metres away I noticed a woman walking a small dog, possibly a puppy. The woman had stopped to watch the dog, something was going on. Then i realised the dog was playing with a magpie. The magpie would hop up to the dog then flap off when the dog bounded over. Then the magpie lay on its back and let the dog sniff it before kicking its legs and flapping its wings, making the dog bounce in delight. The woman crouched nearby watching. I've no idea if any of them noticed me. It went on for at least 5 minutes before i had to leave. A wonderfully surreal, poignant moment during the pandemic. Seems like aeons ago now.
nick__m 4y ago
How did you cope with the loss ? My wife has one metastasis on a vertebrae from a breast cancer that I tought defeated... it was almost the fourth year of cancer free scans when we had the terrible news, a month ago. Even though she's is on expensive drugs and will receive bleeding edge radio surgery in January... I fear that we don't have that much time left together and I don't know how I will cope with that loss.
- geocrasher 4y ago
  Oh man, I am so, so terribly sorry to hear this. You both must be absolutely devastated, both individually and as a couple. Clear open communication, just listening to each other, and accepting that you're both grieving for the loss of her health and for the awful effects it is bound to have. My wife was sick for several years before she passed, and for the last 14 months, we knew it was coming. The main thing that got us both through the ordeal was finding joy in everyday life, wherever we could. My wife was amazing at that, and that had a lot to do with her faith too. I'd be remiss to leave that out. That's also been my coping mechanism in almost every way. But it's not a blind faith that she "went to a better place" or just listening to what some pastor says. My faith is fully informed, and I've chosen it after deep Bible study. I know that may not be the answer you're looking for, but it's the truth. Without my faith I'd have been wrecked. It was hard enough as-is, but the religious organization I belong to has excellent written articles as well as videos that have gotten me through some really, really rough times... the kind you don't know even exist until yougo through them. Foremost however is my relationship with the true God. He has helped me immensely and brought tremendous relief. This isn't a platform for proselytizing, and I respect that, so I've limited my answer to an honest answer to your question. There are resources that I'd love to share with you that will help you even from a secular standpoint. If you'd like, email me at my hn user at gmail. Take care, my friend. You're welcome to reach out to me any time.

austinjp 4y ago

A comment like this shouldn't go without a reply. Saying "sorry for your loss" always seems inadequate, so here's a brief recollection instead. A few months ago, in one of the covid lock downs when social distancing was a thing, I was walking in a park. About 200 metres away I noticed a woman walking a small dog, possibly a puppy. The woman had stopped to watch the dog, something was going on. Then i realised the dog was playing with a magpie. The magpie would hop up to the dog then flap off when the dog bounded over. Then the magpie lay on its back and let the dog sniff it before kicking its legs and flapping its wings, making the dog bounce in delight. The woman crouched nearby watching. I've no idea if any of them noticed me. It went on for at least 5 minutes before i had to leave. A wonderfully surreal, poignant moment during the pandemic. Seems like aeons ago now.

nick__m 4y ago

How did you cope with the loss ? My wife has one metastasis on a vertebrae from a breast cancer that I tought defeated... it was almost the fourth year of cancer free scans when we had the terrible news, a month ago. Even though she's is on expensive drugs and will receive bleeding edge radio surgery in January... I fear that we don't have that much time left together and I don't know how I will cope with that loss.

geocrasher 4y ago
Oh man, I am so, so terribly sorry to hear this. You both must be absolutely devastated, both individually and as a couple. Clear open communication, just listening to each other, and accepting that you're both grieving for the loss of her health and for the awful effects it is bound to have. My wife was sick for several years before she passed, and for the last 14 months, we knew it was coming. The main thing that got us both through the ordeal was finding joy in everyday life, wherever we could. My wife was amazing at that, and that had a lot to do with her faith too. I'd be remiss to leave that out. That's also been my coping mechanism in almost every way. But it's not a blind faith that she "went to a better place" or just listening to what some pastor says. My faith is fully informed, and I've chosen it after deep Bible study. I know that may not be the answer you're looking for, but it's the truth. Without my faith I'd have been wrecked. It was hard enough as-is, but the religious organization I belong to has excellent written articles as well as videos that have gotten me through some really, really rough times... the kind you don't know even exist until yougo through them. Foremost however is my relationship with the true God. He has helped me immensely and brought tremendous relief. This isn't a platform for proselytizing, and I respect that, so I've limited my answer to an honest answer to your question. There are resources that I'd love to share with you that will help you even from a secular standpoint. If you'd like, email me at my hn user at gmail. Take care, my friend. You're welcome to reach out to me any time.