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If it was hard for everyone it wouldn't be such a problem, as presumably people would be more tolerant of others getting it "wrong". As it is, it seems that the
by nicoburns 4y ago
If it was hard for everyone it wouldn't be such a problem, as presumably people would be more tolerant of others getting it "wrong". As it is, it seems that there's a large cadre of people who not only find it easy, but find the "correct" behaviours so self-evident that they tend to assume that people who don't notice these things (or whose natural preferences are different from the unwritten social norm) are being wilfully offensive.
- taeric 4y agoIt is a learned skill. And many norms are not as shared as folks assume they are. As such, I think you are understating how willing folks are to tolerate people getting it "wrong." I say this as someone that would almost certainly be described as neuro divergent. Fake it till you make it is the norm for social interactions. That and repetition. Is akin to thinking everyone else is a good dancer. I mean, the more practiced dancers will be better, at large. There are relatively fewer folks that can't dance, compared to those that don't dance.
- lazide 4y agoYou seem to be assuming they did not try because they assumed they had an incurable problem. Why not assume that they did try (and still are), and after failing over and over when others did not, realized they have a problem and are being open about it? You seem to be denying the problem actually can exist, and blame them for not trying - when you don’t seem to know if they are trying or not. It’s quite odd.
- taeric 4y agoI can be wary of things that I know exist. To the point that I'll argue you seem to be taking my point to an obviously false position. I'm wary of most labeling of this as normal versus otherwise in people. That is it. It presumes a lot of unfairness that, while it does happen, is often overstated, as well.