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I like your advice, except for the insistence on 1:1 meetings only. When there's a dispute on the team, the best option is often to grab a meeting room with a w

I like your advice, except for the insistence on 1:1 meetings only. When there's a dispute on the team, the best option is often to grab a meeting room with a whiteboard and hash it out right then and there. Trying to mediate via 1:1 meetings or e-mail threads often just lets the dispute fester and poisons interpersonal relationships among team members.

renmarksky 15y ago
Meetings aren't easy. Sure it can help to grab a room, gather and talk and calm down but an existing dispute can also further escalate in a larger meeting—it's gambling. One does always loose after a dispute (in his point of view) and that's much harder to accept in front of many than in front of one. If two have already a dispute, sure then you should talk with them both at the same time and act as a moderator. But still it's a very complex dynamic process which is harder to control with more participants. Moreover, you can often clear/avoid a dispute when you had lots of 1-to-1-meetings beforehand where you got a good understanding of peoples thoughts, fears, etc.