Agree with those mentioning seeing a therapist but, until then, here are some books that have helped me and were written by practicing therapists. "Living an E

Agree with those mentioning seeing a therapist but, until then, here are some books that have helped me and were written by practicing therapists. "Living an Examined Life: Wisdom for the Second Half of the Journey" - James Hollis "What Matters Most" - James Hollis "Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart" by Gordon Livingston. I've been finding his other books equally good or better. "The Thing You Think You Cannot Do" covers fear and courage, like the courage to lead the life you want. If you have Netflix, there's a new documentary called "Stutz" where the therapist discusses some of the tools he teaches. It's 90 minutes long and might be even more digestible than those books. Give those a chance. See this as an opportunity to get to know yourself better. Try not to be too hard on yourself (easier to say than do - my therapist still gets onto me after three years together when that part of me comes out).