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>”Mars Inc., when reached for comment on whether or not they feared Binance’s statement might lead to contagion & collapse of their own enterprise, stated “No,

>”Mars Inc., when reached for comment on whether or not they feared Binance’s statement might lead to contagion & collapse of their own enterprise, stated “No, we make things.” When pressed further and informed that similar comments from Binance’s CZ helped precipitate the collapse of FTX— once valued around $32B, close to Mars Inc’s $37B annual revenue— the spokesperson for Mars simply repeated “We make things.” But then after a pause added “And they’re delicious.” These comments have so far baffled crypto insiders who sought clarification after such a brief statement, but Mars Inc has yet to respond.”

Waterluvian 4y ago
Please tell me this is actually real.
- sanj 4y ago
  It isn’t. But reality is almost as good: In a statement, Mars said it was "absurd" to compare its corporate governance and financial reporting requirements with Binance's, adding that its goods and services are "highly regulated."
- ineedasername 4y ago
  I wish it was. It's the reality I pictured in my head if a $37B corporate behemoth perked up its ears at the mention of its name. And send out a confused Assistant Director of PR to comment on why their corporation was not an apt comparison point for Binance when it comes to financial accountability. In my imagination this PR person, with odd brevity for someone in their profession, chose the simplest and most fundamental reason to explain things. And then at the end remembered they should put in a good word for their products while they had the chance. Sadly it's not the world we live in, but if there's any Mars, Incorporated person stumbling on this comment (maybe a dev? They have to have all sorts of IT departments...) do what you can, spread the word, and try to get a PR rep to say something hilarious about this. Maybe something like "Our customers do often find our products have completely disappeared after acquiring them, but in our case they usually find the process enjoyable." Or: "We were crypto before crypto was crypto. Every year countless customers airdrop our "tokens" to children in costumes, or while lying to their kids about a bunny. And as for our industry as a whole if not Mars Inc. itself, I can tell you with absolute truth that what we produce has gone to the moon!"
  - Waterluvian 4y ago
    You’ve got a great imagination. I giggled at this all night.

Waterluvian 4y ago

Please tell me this is actually real.

sanj 4y ago
It isn’t. But reality is almost as good: In a statement, Mars said it was "absurd" to compare its corporate governance and financial reporting requirements with Binance's, adding that its goods and services are "highly regulated."
ineedasername 4y ago
I wish it was. It's the reality I pictured in my head if a $37B corporate behemoth perked up its ears at the mention of its name. And send out a confused Assistant Director of PR to comment on why their corporation was not an apt comparison point for Binance when it comes to financial accountability. In my imagination this PR person, with odd brevity for someone in their profession, chose the simplest and most fundamental reason to explain things. And then at the end remembered they should put in a good word for their products while they had the chance. Sadly it's not the world we live in, but if there's any Mars, Incorporated person stumbling on this comment (maybe a dev? They have to have all sorts of IT departments...) do what you can, spread the word, and try to get a PR rep to say something hilarious about this. Maybe something like "Our customers do often find our products have completely disappeared after acquiring them, but in our case they usually find the process enjoyable." Or: "We were crypto before crypto was crypto. Every year countless customers airdrop our "tokens" to children in costumes, or while lying to their kids about a bunny. And as for our industry as a whole if not Mars Inc. itself, I can tell you with absolute truth that what we produce has gone to the moon!"
- Waterluvian 4y ago
  You’ve got a great imagination. I giggled at this all night.