6 ms·
The current title of this submission ("Worst Opening Sentences of 2022") is not quite correct: the about page [1] states that "the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
by jamessb 4y ago
The current title of this submission ("Worst Opening Sentences of 2022") is not quite correct: the about page [1] states that "the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest challenges entrants to compose opening sentences to the worst of all possible novels".
The opening sentence of (what would be) the worst novel is different to the worst opening sentence of a novel.
The Children's & Young Adult Literature Winner for 2022 [2] is actually a good opening sentence:
> Three bears arrived at their den to discover a yellow haired girl sleeping, and as she was neither too hot nor too cold, neither too soft nor too hard, but just right, they ate her.
[1]: https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/about https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/about
[2]: https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/2022 https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/2022
- enkid 4y agoI mean, it doesn't leave much room for the rest of the novel, but maybe that's the point.
- viridian 4y agoMakes for a good cold open where you want to inform the reader of some detail that the book's characters aren't privy to.
- sph 4y agoIt's very post-modern. You start with the ending, and then the rest of the book is how everything that happened led to her untimely demise.
- permo-w 4y agoit’s barely post-modern. it’s a boring and overused tv plot technique that makes me groan whenever I come across it. build up excitement, tension, drama, create an interesting scene, then throw it all away with a “how did we get here” and a roll back in time
- sph 4y agoPost-modernism is 50 years old, and refers to the modernity of the first half of that century. Of course it feels cliché and outdated in 2022.
- rintakumpu 4y agoYes. And I was so happy when Squid Game didn't do that.
- idontpost 4y ago
- BellsOnSunday 4y agoYep. That's me. I bet you're wondering how I got myself into this situation...
- willi59549879 4y agothree weeks earlier... i don't like when stories start that way
- bearmode 4y agoMaybe the novel's about the bears?
- bryanrasmussen 4y agoSadly the girl was not just any wanderer in the woods, she was the daughter of the psychotic and vengeful huntsman, thus began a game pitting bears and man in a contest for supremacy that would change the enchanted forest - forever.
- AnimalMuppet 4y agoThe bears being pursued by humans because they ate the girl, and therefore having to leave their nice home and live life on the run.
- salawat 4y agoStarring Liam Neeson as the hunter... Goldilocks They ate his little girl... Now he's pissed. Coming to a theater near you. Plot twist: Was a frame job by the Big Bad Wolf.
- bostik 4y agoMy all-time favourite is the dishonourable mention for 2004 Children's Literature: As he entered the room within which so many a wild night of their sweltering love affair had been spent, the White Rabbit regarded her with benevolent eyes, her posture such that he suspected something was wrong, but before he could speak Alice unburied her face from her trembling hands and between her intense sobs he made out the words, "I'm late . . . I'm late." Perfect. Simply perfect.
- dylan604 4y agoAerosmith's "You can't catch me 'cause the rabbit done died" seems apropos here