jvm, I think a big reason this happens to women is because they make their femaleness a thing: they talk about it, write about it, etc. They may not INTEND to

jvm, I think a big reason this happens to women is because they make their femaleness a thing: they talk about it, write about it, etc. They may not INTEND to sound as if "furthering women is job #1" -- but they give out a message that it's important to them, perhaps inadvertently. This won't-intro-me-to-men thing has never happened to me. However, I don't make a big deal out of the fact that I'm a woman. I also don't tend to do things like go to "girl geek dinners" or whatever, because I find them sexist & obnoxious. What does happen to me is that women "in technology" will presume that I am interested in them, agree with them, support their agenda, value the things they value, etc., simply because I have breasts and a vagina. Which irritates the daylights out of me. (Their presumption, that is, not my equipment.) The OP author makes a great point -- try to meet the people who are the best people for you to meet, regardless of in-born traits. I definitely agree with it. I simply also believe women have more of a hand in causing these situations for themselves than they want to admit.