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> For most my friends, the question they pose is what is the benefit of marriage? You tie yourself down to monogamy, give up your personal life and risk losing
by yojo 4y ago
> For most my friends, the question they pose is what is the benefit of marriage? You tie yourself down to monogamy, give up your personal life and risk losing half of it plus a life of child support and alimony in a divorce.
I’ll bite: If you do it right, you get to spend every night with the person you love the most in the world.
I’ve been with my wife for 20 years and we still stay up too late at least once a week because we don’t want to stop our conversation. It is the richest, most fulfilling relationship I can imagine.
Beyond companionship, she is the ultimate ally. If I tell her I need her help, she is there for me 100%.
No matter my ups or downs, successes or failures, I have someone I can trust for advice and lean on whenever I need it.
Of course, this reliance goes both ways, but I feel great when I can help her back. My identity has stretched to include being part of this amazing team.
Obviously, there’s a trade off, but for me it was minor. Dating always felt like the worst kind of interviewing to me. I’ll happily take 20 years of shared memories over a rotating cast of fresh faces.
- leto_ii 4y ago> I’ve been with my wife for 20 years and we still stay up too late at least once a week because we don’t want to stop our conversation. It is the richest, most fulfilling relationship I can imagine. > Beyond companionship, she is the ultimate ally. If I tell her I need her help, she is there for me 100%. Congratulations and may it never change for you. I do however have to say that that is not the case for most marriages/ long term monogamous relationships. If you could somehow set aside social pressure, shared financial burdens, guilt over messing up the kids etc. I think most existing marriages would break down. Few people actually share deep love, friendship and real, freely accepted commitment.
- Semaphor 4y ago> Few people actually share deep love, friendship and real, freely accepted commitment. I hope this isn’t true (I don’t know any statistics that support or disprove this), that’d be incredibly sad. Luckily, I’m happily married and childless.