3 ms·

Why on Earth would I care? I can be referenced as "he" or "she" only if you are talking about me to somebody else, right? It's not my business to even listen to

Why on Earth would I care? I can be referenced as "he" or "she" only if you are talking about me to somebody else, right? It's not my business to even listen to such talk. But if you insist - could you please refer to me by Russian pronouns I've just listed. Is it really that much harder to learn 6 short foreign words than some "English" ones like "zee", "vi" and "vim"? But again, why stop at short ones? If you insist that my pronouns are there for my comfort (but not for your convenience while speaking about me) - could you please refer to me as "they-masters-of-Universe-and-true-electors-of-American-presidents"? So that your listener will know that my gender is "Russian male". It will give me a huge comfort.

SuoDuanDao 4y ago
My preferred pronouns are 'latefordinner' and 'delayedfordinner'. It's a reference to a very old English joke going 'you can call me almost anything you want - but don't call me late for dinner'. My way of saying the inquirer can even call me late for dinner if they want. I realize this is serious business to some people, but I also want to signal that it is very much not serious business to me.
wbazant 4y ago
Well, sometimes your identity is referenced in a group setting while you're part of the group, say when a manager praises your work in a standup: "MikePlacid did a really good job with this feature, you should all be like _". I'm guessing people know which pronoun to use in those situations when talking about you, probably because you regularly broadcast your identity as a Russian male. The English-speaking world has largely settled on singular 'they' as a catch-all for the small minority that prefers neither he or she. Practically it looks like an extra drop-down option on official forms, and when you meet someone who looks like they don't try to go with a stereotype of any particular gender you can optionally ask them what pronoun they go by. Those made-up pronouns are a fringe thing, some internet communities will make them into a game. On the other hand, if we met and you preferred we switched to Russian, I would totally try to accommodate that!

SuoDuanDao 4y ago

My preferred pronouns are 'latefordinner' and 'delayedfordinner'. It's a reference to a very old English joke going 'you can call me almost anything you want - but don't call me late for dinner'. My way of saying the inquirer can even call me late for dinner if they want. I realize this is serious business to some people, but I also want to signal that it is very much not serious business to me.

wbazant 4y ago

Well, sometimes your identity is referenced in a group setting while you're part of the group, say when a manager praises your work in a standup: "MikePlacid did a really good job with this feature, you should all be like _". I'm guessing people know which pronoun to use in those situations when talking about you, probably because you regularly broadcast your identity as a Russian male. The English-speaking world has largely settled on singular 'they' as a catch-all for the small minority that prefers neither he or she. Practically it looks like an extra drop-down option on official forms, and when you meet someone who looks like they don't try to go with a stereotype of any particular gender you can optionally ask them what pronoun they go by. Those made-up pronouns are a fringe thing, some internet communities will make them into a game. On the other hand, if we met and you preferred we switched to Russian, I would totally try to accommodate that!