3 ms·
> Real parents consistently make it clear how terrible having kids is. What world do you live in? I have 4 (soon to be 5) kids myself and I’m happy with my cho
by D13Fd 4y ago
> Real parents consistently make it clear how terrible having kids is.
What world do you live in? I have 4 (soon to be 5) kids myself and I’m happy with my choices. I know many families with kids, and only a small percentage seem unhappy, similar to most other life choices.
- naasking 4y ago> I know many families with kids, and only a small percentage seem unhappy, similar to most other life choices. "Seem" is the keyword. People successfully hide suicidal depression from close friends and family, so I'm not sure why you think people can't hide mild unhappiness.
- D13Fd 4y agoIf they "seem" happy, then they are not "consistently mak[ing] it clear how terrible having kids is."
- naasking 4y agoYou're talking about two different contexts: they can make happy while with friends and family where there are social expectations, and they can also report how they honestly feel in anonymous or confidential circumstances, like surveys, studies and therapy. The analogy I made to depression was intentional because it exhibits exactly this pattern: every depressed person consistently reports how terrible it is, and yet they often make a show of appearing happy in public.
- D13Fd 4y agoI'm talking about the statement that "Real parents consistently make it clear how terrible having kids is." If they "seem" happy in all my interactions, I don't see how they can be "consistently mak[ing] clear how terrible having kids is." I also don't see how some secret only-tell-the-therapist-and-pollsters views could qualify as "consistently mak[ing] clear" their supposed negative feelings.