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Like with most things, I think the right move for an adult is to help the child solve the problem themselves, rather than do it for them. As other posts have me
by thegrimmest 4y ago
Like with most things, I think the right move for an adult is to help the child solve the problem themselves, rather than do it for them. As other posts have mentioned, learning when and how to apply violence is a critical skill. We (particularly children) do not live in a post-violence society. Children should of course not feel abandoned by those closest to them, but being overprotective can have its own negative consequences for development.
It's clearly a fine line to walk, but if you're being bullied then what you need is to learn how to address/discourage that behaviour - not an intervention. Otherwise all you're doing is deferring the learning experience until next time. Past a certain window it's very hard to learn this skill, and you can be stuck with a helpless mentality for your whole life.
- deleted 4y ago[deleted]
- mcguire 4y agoHomicide and suicide are the second and third leading causes of death for teens and young adults following accidents (primarily motor vehicle). (If it matters to you, males are much more likely to die and females are more likely to report bullying.)
- thegrimmest 4y agowell of course - how else are the healthiest members of our population going to die?
- Nasrudith 4y agoPutting aside outliers like kids wity cancer, there is what is diplomatically called "death by misadventure". Or less diplomatically winning a Darwin award.
- oblib 4y agoI got pretty good at avoiding fights with bullies and dumbasses. And I never started a fight. I always made an effort to avoid fighting. But I did become a "fan" of boxing at a very early age and studied how boxers fought. How they setup opponents, threw punches, and especially how they avoided getting hit. Most kids don't do that so it's pretty easy to gain an advantage. And bullies tend to leave kids alone who they know will fight back. I grew up in some pretty rough neighborhoods so I was motivated to learn.