I have very similar experience, to the point where I believe the only place where I would be really happy can only be place which I own (currently out of my rea

I have very similar experience, to the point where I believe the only place where I would be really happy can only be place which I own (currently out of my reach). So since I can't be in my perfect place I had to make concious step to admit that I'm contracted software engineer and that I have to find ways to get along with people, which means taking compromises, learning to be more humble and finding ways to stay motivated.. Sure, there are days I'm not at my best but instead of despearing and feeling depressed about it I make myself to move out of that emotional state by applying some tricks I gathered along the way. I can't be 100% productive all the time, I try to be 70%-80% productive most of the time. And when I feel it's the time to move I do it without looking back, my mental wellbeing is more important than building the picture of super stable engineer. 5 years is already long in terms of current standards.