I completely understand how you feel regarding the dissonance, because I can also feel the same way. Sometimes depression makes it easy to "rationally know" you

I completely understand how you feel regarding the dissonance, because I can also feel the same way. Sometimes depression makes it easy to "rationally know" you have a lot to be grateful for, but it can somehow be twisted against oneself and turned into shame. Practicing gratitude can help you to learn how to allow yourself to feel happiness and contentment. In an ELI5-type answer: "Practicing" gratitude involves actively noticing your feelings of appreciation for something good in your life. That something good may be a meal, a relationship, overcoming an challenge, etc. For an adult beginner a gratitude journal is a great place to start! You can purchase one, like the "6-Minute Journal" or you can grab a blank piece of paper and pick a prompt from this pdf[1]. Pick a prompt: "Something beautiful I saw today..." "A fun experience I had..." "Someone I admire.." and spend a few minutes writing about that. Write in your journal 2-3 times a week. That's it! [1]: https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/gratitude-journal https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/gratitude-journal