I have wanted to do a lot of things throughout my life since 15/16 but lack of discipline usually pulls me away from having a deep study on any of them. I'm now

I have wanted to do a lot of things throughout my life since 15/16 but lack of discipline usually pulls me away from having a deep study on any of them. I'm now 40 and achieved nothing I have wanted. Everything I "achieved" I either wish I didn't achieve or I just completed them grudgingly. I kinda give up and wish I lived in a prison that just forced me to achieve anything I have wanted to do. Maybe I'm not actually interested in all those but at least I get more trophies to show.