3 ms·

I had a similar experience finding a therapist who could work with “religious trauma”. Part of the reason I finally started calling it a cult (despite the stigm

I had a similar experience finding a therapist who could work with “religious trauma”. Part of the reason I finally started calling it a cult (despite the stigma) is that at least in the US that seemed to help people understand that I meant something deeper and darker than the average person. (Not to mention: a lot of people get really touchy with the idea that religion can be “traumatic” at all.)

tomrod 4y ago
Isn't that odd, that people are gunshy to acknowledge religion as traumatic? There is one comment on the board calling out the article's negatively towards magical thinking as bigotry. To folks that are recovering from religious trauma, it's straight up lived experience.
- drewbug01 4y ago
  > Isn't that odd, that people are gunshy to acknowledge religion as traumatic? Truthfully? I find it very difficult to see religion as anything other than traumatic, because what I went through was so bad and different than what most people think of when they think of “religion.” I don’t know if I have any real objectivity in the matter. I do feel that there is something interesting in that line of thought, however. Perhaps it has to do with the intensely personal nature of religious conviction, and the existential subject matter it deals with?
  - tomrod 4y ago
    A few years out, while I'll never return to religion, I get the draw of community and the lack of really caring about what others define as the worldview for most adherents still in their respective systems. Something of genuine objectivity can be returned to by victims of religious trauma, IMHO, but it takes a lot of processing and a general sense of cynical apathy. All and all, communities in general can create trauma. Its odd to me that many religions tend to be especially good at it. On the other hand, some religions I respect greatly for their desire to improve the lives of their adherents. Reform Judaism and their commitment to tzedakah and tikkun olam, Sikhism, liberal Christianity, and so forth. Religion is a mechanism to transfer culture (though not exclusively so). When it cuts out its feedback mechanisms in its governance structure, it inevitably becomes toxic.
wonder_er 4y ago
> a lot of people get really touchy with the idea that religion can be “traumatic” at all. 1000x. I think religion gets traumatic when it is all about dressing up guilt and shame for behavior control. That is when it gets traumatic. Parents using shame to get specific behaviors from their kids (or prevent certain behaviors) are turning a very powerful tool against their kids, and it hurts everyone. I'm no-contact with _both_ my parents, over this issue, and they're not even able to perceive that they used shame, constantly, against all three of their children, and continue to do so.

tomrod 4y ago

Isn't that odd, that people are gunshy to acknowledge religion as traumatic? There is one comment on the board calling out the article's negatively towards magical thinking as bigotry. To folks that are recovering from religious trauma, it's straight up lived experience.

drewbug01 4y ago
> Isn't that odd, that people are gunshy to acknowledge religion as traumatic? Truthfully? I find it very difficult to see religion as anything other than traumatic, because what I went through was so bad and different than what most people think of when they think of “religion.” I don’t know if I have any real objectivity in the matter. I do feel that there is something interesting in that line of thought, however. Perhaps it has to do with the intensely personal nature of religious conviction, and the existential subject matter it deals with?
- tomrod 4y ago
  A few years out, while I'll never return to religion, I get the draw of community and the lack of really caring about what others define as the worldview for most adherents still in their respective systems. Something of genuine objectivity can be returned to by victims of religious trauma, IMHO, but it takes a lot of processing and a general sense of cynical apathy. All and all, communities in general can create trauma. Its odd to me that many religions tend to be especially good at it. On the other hand, some religions I respect greatly for their desire to improve the lives of their adherents. Reform Judaism and their commitment to tzedakah and tikkun olam, Sikhism, liberal Christianity, and so forth. Religion is a mechanism to transfer culture (though not exclusively so). When it cuts out its feedback mechanisms in its governance structure, it inevitably becomes toxic.

wonder_er 4y ago

> a lot of people get really touchy with the idea that religion can be “traumatic” at all. 1000x. I think religion gets traumatic when it is all about dressing up guilt and shame for behavior control. That is when it gets traumatic. Parents using shame to get specific behaviors from their kids (or prevent certain behaviors) are turning a very powerful tool against their kids, and it hurts everyone. I'm no-contact with _both_ my parents, over this issue, and they're not even able to perceive that they used shame, constantly, against all three of their children, and continue to do so.