4 ms·

I also stopped using dating apps. The statistics are just sh*t. I don't want to chat to so many people I have nothing in common with and I hate the interchangea

I also stopped using dating apps. The statistics are just sh*t. I don't want to chat to so many people I have nothing in common with and I hate the interchangeability. I want connection, not bad feelings. I'll just force myself to go out more, to events and places where people like me hang out at. And voila, I just met a girl at a climbing gym 2 weeks ago.

the_only_law 4y ago
Yeah even the people I do have stuff in common with just fizzles out. I’m convinced many interactions would have ended differently if we had met in an irl environment, it’s much easier to get a feel for someone and to feel connected to them irl vs in a pure text style chat. I’m a bad tenet anyway and will ignore messages if I don’t have an immediate response at the moment. Only problem with irl is that the demographics are weird.
- RamblingCTO 4y ago
  Yeah true, and what is the hard part is waiting for maybe years until you meet the next person. That bug me quite a lot. But it is what it is and forces me to go out of my comfort zone. > Only problem with irl is that the demographics are weird. How so?
  - the_only_law 4y ago
    For some reason, could be local demographics, could be the places I go, but I weirdly rarely see people around my age when I go out. I’ve spoken to plenty of people men and women 5-50+ years older than me, but rarely anyone around my age. I’ve met a few people a little younger, but very rarely. For reference I’m in my mid 20s. Most people I talk to are their late 20s to early 30s or middle aged. However, if I were to download a dating app, I’d see plenty of people in my area around my age.
    - RamblingCTO 4y ago
      I actually have the same problem. I live in one of the biggest cities in Germany but never seem to hang around spots where any interesting potential dates are. I see them on the streets though. But I'm just treating this as a game. I'll try to widen my social circle with activities I like. Because it's a very bank-heavy city and I'm an outdoor guy it's difficult. I did a climbing course a few weeks ago and actually met a girl. Mismatch of goals but still. Maybe change the activities you do? (Needs to be authentic though)

the_only_law 4y ago

Yeah even the people I do have stuff in common with just fizzles out. I’m convinced many interactions would have ended differently if we had met in an irl environment, it’s much easier to get a feel for someone and to feel connected to them irl vs in a pure text style chat. I’m a bad tenet anyway and will ignore messages if I don’t have an immediate response at the moment. Only problem with irl is that the demographics are weird.

RamblingCTO 4y ago
Yeah true, and what is the hard part is waiting for maybe years until you meet the next person. That bug me quite a lot. But it is what it is and forces me to go out of my comfort zone. > Only problem with irl is that the demographics are weird. How so?
- the_only_law 4y ago
  For some reason, could be local demographics, could be the places I go, but I weirdly rarely see people around my age when I go out. I’ve spoken to plenty of people men and women 5-50+ years older than me, but rarely anyone around my age. I’ve met a few people a little younger, but very rarely. For reference I’m in my mid 20s. Most people I talk to are their late 20s to early 30s or middle aged. However, if I were to download a dating app, I’d see plenty of people in my area around my age.
  - RamblingCTO 4y ago
    I actually have the same problem. I live in one of the biggest cities in Germany but never seem to hang around spots where any interesting potential dates are. I see them on the streets though. But I'm just treating this as a game. I'll try to widen my social circle with activities I like. Because it's a very bank-heavy city and I'm an outdoor guy it's difficult. I did a climbing course a few weeks ago and actually met a girl. Mismatch of goals but still. Maybe change the activities you do? (Needs to be authentic though)