4 ms·
"Wow, that sucks. How are you holding up? Let me know if I can help, like with practice questions or whatever. If you've got time this weekend we can grab lunch
by ungawatkt 4y ago
"Wow, that sucks. How are you holding up? Let me know if I can help, like with practice questions or whatever. If you've got time this weekend we can grab lunch."
It's not perfect, but you can go a long way with something like the above: unqualified acknowledgement, interest in their well-being, offer of support with an example, and a non-pushy offer to have some company/fun/distraction. Swap in specific phrasing as you'd like.
- HarryHirsch 4y agoTo someone from a more collectivist culture this sounds perfectly noncommittal - a weak reed that pierces the hand of anyone who would support himself on it. What is there to be had, except lunch expenses?
- jackbravo 4y agoOh wow. What would be more appropriate in a collectivist culture? Avoiding the message and instead go over to their house to do the things suggested above?
- HarryHirsch 4y agoOffering to pass the name around in your circles or keeping ears open at your company, that would be actually helpful. I've always found "let me know how I can help" code for "don't bother me" in America. Especially bad and a red flag: "If you've got time this weekend we can grab lunch." The fellow might be in crisis now, but don't bother me until the weekend.
- ungawatkt 4y agoLike I said, change the specific phrasing as you want and makes sense, every situation and person is different. The goals were "offer help with an actual example" and "offering company/fun/distraction without being pushy", it doesn't have to be a weekend lunch or looking over practice questions, it could also be sending their resume to friends and gaming together later that night, same same.
- theironhammer 4y ago
- deeblering4 4y agoPersonally I'd stop talking after "how are you holding up?" and just listen to them.