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Well, the frustrating thing about love, even after betrayal, is that your biological make up makes you believe you need that person. It took me a long time befo

Well, the frustrating thing about love, even after betrayal, is that your biological make up makes you believe you need that person. It took me a long time before I lost hope and decided even feeling that way wasn't worth being with that person. You can only be walked over so much before there's no other option but to say fuck it, I've had enough. As for killing myself, to cause her pain. It just doesn't work, because I don't get to see what effect it has. And she'll get over it far too quickly, anyway.

Mz 15y ago
Not to put you down, but I seriously doubt you are as acquainted with relationship drama as I am. It can be gotten past. Below is the link to my blog, where I have spent the past few months "anonymously" talking about my love life, debugging my own wetware, blah blah blah. It is specifically the link to the archive. I suggest you start at the beginning and go through it in chronological order (edit: Though the beginning is kind of slow and things don't pick up until mid June, I suggest you bear with it). Consider it a Christmas gift (because I have so far mostly tried to keep this off HN -- I really don't need 500 men hitting on me). However, I have added a donate button and I have a t-shirt in mind I want to create. Given my current situation (which I know you know about since you replied here: http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3350035 http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3350035), any suggestions on how to monetize it are welcome. I think it's a good read. I'm not asking for charity (if you get value out of reading it and donate, hey, that's not charity. Comics do that all the time). I just historically have never managed to get much monetary value back for what I put out there and I would like to change that. http://www.novemberwest.com/blog/archive/ http://www.novemberwest.com/blog/archive/ Peace and happy holidays. I'm going to go to work now.
- justaname 15y ago
  > Not to put you down, but I seriously doubt you are as acquainted with relationship drama as I am. Ouch..
  - Mz 15y ago
    So far, no one has been murdered or gone to jail over it. So far, so good. I hope you enjoy the blog and I hope it helps you get through this. Logging off now as my shift is starting. I don't typically post from work.
    - justaname 15y ago
      I appreciate you offering the blog to read, and I've skimmed some, but the several mentions of infidelity are simply salt for my wounds. I have an absolutely furious anger towards infidelity, for which I won't ever again be made to apologize. EDIT: I appreciate your background, and also that you offered the blog in good faith.
nyellin 15y ago
I'm sorry to hear your story. You deserve better. Remember that you have all the options in the world. If life is only be worth living with a fresh start, sell your apartment, take one suitcase, and travel to Paris or London or Australia. Your life is yours to do what you wish, not what others expect. Live in whatever way makes life worthwhile. If you ever want someone to talk to, you can email me at aantny@gmail.com. I can probably host you for a night if you need to crash in Israel.
- justaname 15y ago
  Wow, cool offer :) Australia's my next destination. The place I used to call home and will again soon. It's my light at the end of the tunnel, for the moment.
  - hessenwolf 15y ago
    Did you move to England?
    - justaname 15y ago
      Nope, Switzerland. The people here don't have the concept of having your back. They figure, if it doesn't affect their person directly, they're better off keeping to themselves. The neutrality of the country matches the way they deal with day-to-day problems within the country. This is an over generalisation, because there are some wonderful people here, like everywhere, but the general attitude that I've seen is the one I've described. If you don't fit the standard mould, or can't fake it, you won't be very successful here, and the standard mould is extremely conservative. One of the important lessons I learnt growing up in Australia was that you have to be there for your mates, even if you have to put your body on the line. I've seen what can happen when you don't and I'll never allow that again, if I can help it.

Mz 15y ago

Not to put you down, but I seriously doubt you are as acquainted with relationship drama as I am. It can be gotten past. Below is the link to my blog, where I have spent the past few months "anonymously" talking about my love life, debugging my own wetware, blah blah blah. It is specifically the link to the archive. I suggest you start at the beginning and go through it in chronological order (edit: Though the beginning is kind of slow and things don't pick up until mid June, I suggest you bear with it). Consider it a Christmas gift (because I have so far mostly tried to keep this off HN -- I really don't need 500 men hitting on me). However, I have added a donate button and I have a t-shirt in mind I want to create. Given my current situation (which I know you know about since you replied here: http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3350035 http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3350035), any suggestions on how to monetize it are welcome. I think it's a good read. I'm not asking for charity (if you get value out of reading it and donate, hey, that's not charity. Comics do that all the time). I just historically have never managed to get much monetary value back for what I put out there and I would like to change that. http://www.novemberwest.com/blog/archive/ http://www.novemberwest.com/blog/archive/ Peace and happy holidays. I'm going to go to work now.

justaname 15y ago
> Not to put you down, but I seriously doubt you are as acquainted with relationship drama as I am. Ouch..
- Mz 15y ago
  So far, no one has been murdered or gone to jail over it. So far, so good. I hope you enjoy the blog and I hope it helps you get through this. Logging off now as my shift is starting. I don't typically post from work.
  - justaname 15y ago
    I appreciate you offering the blog to read, and I've skimmed some, but the several mentions of infidelity are simply salt for my wounds. I have an absolutely furious anger towards infidelity, for which I won't ever again be made to apologize. EDIT: I appreciate your background, and also that you offered the blog in good faith.

nyellin 15y ago

I'm sorry to hear your story. You deserve better. Remember that you have all the options in the world. If life is only be worth living with a fresh start, sell your apartment, take one suitcase, and travel to Paris or London or Australia. Your life is yours to do what you wish, not what others expect. Live in whatever way makes life worthwhile. If you ever want someone to talk to, you can email me at aantny@gmail.com. I can probably host you for a night if you need to crash in Israel.

justaname 15y ago
Wow, cool offer :) Australia's my next destination. The place I used to call home and will again soon. It's my light at the end of the tunnel, for the moment.
- hessenwolf 15y ago
  Did you move to England?
  - justaname 15y ago
    Nope, Switzerland. The people here don't have the concept of having your back. They figure, if it doesn't affect their person directly, they're better off keeping to themselves. The neutrality of the country matches the way they deal with day-to-day problems within the country. This is an over generalisation, because there are some wonderful people here, like everywhere, but the general attitude that I've seen is the one I've described. If you don't fit the standard mould, or can't fake it, you won't be very successful here, and the standard mould is extremely conservative. One of the important lessons I learnt growing up in Australia was that you have to be there for your mates, even if you have to put your body on the line. I've seen what can happen when you don't and I'll never allow that again, if I can help it.