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If you haven't learned to deal with mocking in other ways than sobbing I'd argue you haven't really grown up. Like I wrote down below - this is a totally noncon

If you haven't learned to deal with mocking in other ways than sobbing I'd argue you haven't really grown up. Like I wrote down below - this is a totally nonconfrontational situation (there is no direct risk from agressive behavior) - sort of like someone making a mean comment passing by you - if it hurts you so much you likely have confidence issues in this regard - and as much as we're trying to create safe places all over - working with these people is a chore.

hgomersall 4y ago
And the response was non confrontational - she just pointed out that the tweets were objectionable, which they were, and that she was upset by them, which I assume she was. No suggestion she was sobbing. Everyone was free to ignore her, but tellingly did not. Even you feel the need to add your pennyworth, so perhaps you need to stop feeling the need to express your opinion at us all; I could make some assertions about your maturity to that end, but will not (because I don't think it). Working with people that lack emotional intelligence is a chore.
- moonchrome 4y ago
  - hgomersall 4y ago
    The fact she was actually sobbing (assuming that wasn't a rhetorical point) does not make your response better, and was tangential to the point I was making. Too much of a chore to assume that I hadn't internalised every line but still understand the point that was being made? Your snark is not becoming.
sho_hn 4y ago
It takes a fair amount of maturity and character strength to be the object of public ridicule over one's abilities, and proceed to write a calm blog post about it calling it out. I was impressed, also by the follow-up. I'm sure the vast majority of people would have either reacted defensively and been intimidated into taking the project down, or reacted angrily (and likely still modified or taken the project down).
RamblingCTO 4y ago
Imho this is the problem behind the mental health crisis for men. > If you haven't learned to deal with mocking in other ways than sobbing I'd argue you haven't really grown up. Communicating your emotions about something purely for what they are takes courage and is the most important thing an adult can learn. You obviously can't expect that others respect your emotions or that you are entitled to anything at all, but purely communicating them goes a long way. "Growing up" also is a very weird concept. You have no idea as to why the blog post author sobbed or if this was even just used as a rhetorical device. Are you only grown up after you got your mental health in order? If so, that gives an average of 50+ for some people, and never for most.
- moonchrome 4y ago
  Communicating emotions is orthogonal to managing them - if you let mean comments of irrelevant strangers impact you that emotionally you are going to be emotionally unstable.
  - RamblingCTO 4y ago
    Sorry, bullshit. We're social beings. You can tell yourself all you want that others and mean comments don't affect you, but I don't think that's true at all.

hgomersall 4y ago

And the response was non confrontational - she just pointed out that the tweets were objectionable, which they were, and that she was upset by them, which I assume she was. No suggestion she was sobbing. Everyone was free to ignore her, but tellingly did not. Even you feel the need to add your pennyworth, so perhaps you need to stop feeling the need to express your opinion at us all; I could make some assertions about your maturity to that end, but will not (because I don't think it). Working with people that lack emotional intelligence is a chore.

moonchrome 4y ago
- hgomersall 4y ago
  The fact she was actually sobbing (assuming that wasn't a rhetorical point) does not make your response better, and was tangential to the point I was making. Too much of a chore to assume that I hadn't internalised every line but still understand the point that was being made? Your snark is not becoming.

sho_hn 4y ago

It takes a fair amount of maturity and character strength to be the object of public ridicule over one's abilities, and proceed to write a calm blog post about it calling it out. I was impressed, also by the follow-up. I'm sure the vast majority of people would have either reacted defensively and been intimidated into taking the project down, or reacted angrily (and likely still modified or taken the project down).

RamblingCTO 4y ago

Imho this is the problem behind the mental health crisis for men. > If you haven't learned to deal with mocking in other ways than sobbing I'd argue you haven't really grown up. Communicating your emotions about something purely for what they are takes courage and is the most important thing an adult can learn. You obviously can't expect that others respect your emotions or that you are entitled to anything at all, but purely communicating them goes a long way. "Growing up" also is a very weird concept. You have no idea as to why the blog post author sobbed or if this was even just used as a rhetorical device. Are you only grown up after you got your mental health in order? If so, that gives an average of 50+ for some people, and never for most.

moonchrome 4y ago
Communicating emotions is orthogonal to managing them - if you let mean comments of irrelevant strangers impact you that emotionally you are going to be emotionally unstable.
- RamblingCTO 4y ago
  Sorry, bullshit. We're social beings. You can tell yourself all you want that others and mean comments don't affect you, but I don't think that's true at all.