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I have spent half a career leaving at 5 (and 8 years leaving much earlier to pick up kids who now walk from school again on their own). If I ever as much as hea

I have spent half a career leaving at 5 (and 8 years leaving much earlier to pick up kids who now walk from school again on their own). If I ever as much as heard a mumble about not working enough when I do 40 hours I’d insta-quit that job. Yes I did some long days occasionally but I did them because I felt it was needed and because it fit my personal life on that day. Not because someone told me it was needed.

codeduck 4y ago
Amen. Short-term long hour stints (a week at most) are doable - if they can be motivated. Beyond that and it's indicative of a failure of planning, to which my response is "Do not attempt to make your failure of planning my problem."
hungryforcodes 4y ago
True, parents have this weird privilege where they can leave at 4:30pm with some excuse about the kids and leave the rest of us to pick up the slack until 7:30pm...
- alkonaut 4y ago
  Well that’s the time I need to pick them up. The alternative would be to quit or work 80% but most employers prefer people to stay on 100% which means doing some emailing in the evenings to catch up with the hours. 4.30 is my normal leave time now without kids though (8-4.30 with a half hour unpaid lunch break is my schedule for 40h/week). Kids sports practice etc regularly starts at 5PM or even 4PM. Being a parent is just fundamentally incompatible with working past 6PM, at least where I live.
  - DoingIsLearning 4y ago
    If I may say so you don't have to justify fuck all. If someone else doesn't understand the boundaries between work and personal life, and tops it off with trying to guilt trip you, then that is on them and whatever corporate/VC kool-aid they are drinking. You can only wish that this is something they will come to realize (hopefully not too late in their life to avoid unnecessary regret).
    - alkonaut 4y ago
      I’m lucky enough to live in a country where all this is taken for granted. When I take 6 or 12 months parental leave I just get a pat on the back from both colleagues and management. Same when I leave at 3PM to pick up kids. Everyone understands that this is how it works. Work is something we do when our lives permit it. Not the other way around.
      - hungryforcodes 4y ago
        You just proved my OP, btw.
        alkonaut 4y ago
        It's not a privilege for parents. Me leaving at 4 or 4.30 doesn't mean someone else has to work until 6PM. That's the key. My childless colleagues leave at 5 or 5.30, every day of every year. And they start later because their morning routine is different. It's true that I'm privileged, but the privilege starts with an important culture of "no one does more than 40h, period". Without that, you have no chance to have a healthy work life balance as a parent or as a non-parent.

codeduck 4y ago

Amen. Short-term long hour stints (a week at most) are doable - if they can be motivated. Beyond that and it's indicative of a failure of planning, to which my response is "Do not attempt to make your failure of planning my problem."

hungryforcodes 4y ago

True, parents have this weird privilege where they can leave at 4:30pm with some excuse about the kids and leave the rest of us to pick up the slack until 7:30pm...

alkonaut 4y ago
Well that’s the time I need to pick them up. The alternative would be to quit or work 80% but most employers prefer people to stay on 100% which means doing some emailing in the evenings to catch up with the hours. 4.30 is my normal leave time now without kids though (8-4.30 with a half hour unpaid lunch break is my schedule for 40h/week). Kids sports practice etc regularly starts at 5PM or even 4PM. Being a parent is just fundamentally incompatible with working past 6PM, at least where I live.
- DoingIsLearning 4y ago
  If I may say so you don't have to justify fuck all. If someone else doesn't understand the boundaries between work and personal life, and tops it off with trying to guilt trip you, then that is on them and whatever corporate/VC kool-aid they are drinking. You can only wish that this is something they will come to realize (hopefully not too late in their life to avoid unnecessary regret).
  - alkonaut 4y ago
    I’m lucky enough to live in a country where all this is taken for granted. When I take 6 or 12 months parental leave I just get a pat on the back from both colleagues and management. Same when I leave at 3PM to pick up kids. Everyone understands that this is how it works. Work is something we do when our lives permit it. Not the other way around.
    - hungryforcodes 4y ago
      You just proved my OP, btw.
      - alkonaut 4y ago
        It's not a privilege for parents. Me leaving at 4 or 4.30 doesn't mean someone else has to work until 6PM. That's the key. My childless colleagues leave at 5 or 5.30, every day of every year. And they start later because their morning routine is different. It's true that I'm privileged, but the privilege starts with an important culture of "no one does more than 40h, period". Without that, you have no chance to have a healthy work life balance as a parent or as a non-parent.