4 ms·

Are you denying that there are women who want to be submissive and raise a family? Nothing the parent said suggested that all women want that. Agreed that rais

Are you denying that there are women who want to be submissive and raise a family? Nothing the parent said suggested that all women want that. Agreed that raising a family is difficult and challenging.

gruseom 15y ago
"Submissive" is pejorative. You might as well say "bitch" (edit: almost). I mightn't have picked up on this if he hadn't also said "everything difficult and challenging". I actually agree with the point about feminism being to some extent a prejudice of its own that makes some women feel bad about wanting what they want. But they're figuring it out. We're, what, 50 years into this? That's lightning-fast change. It's fine to let the pendulum swing back and forth a few times. The more pressing question in the long run might be how we got into a situation where both men and women have to work full-time in order to have things (like a house) that a single-salary family used to be able to afford.
- roguecoder 15y ago
  The problem is that we gave women more options without actually dismantling patriarchy. We just gave them the option to join in men's crappy patriarchal bargain, which still kind of sucks. If feminism had succeeded as many men as women would want to stay at home in a D/s relationship and raise the children, though I think there would also be Doms who'd want to stay home and raise children. As long as we think of "Staying Home and Raising Children" as something women do, or something that is a separate and mutually exclusive choice with being in the public sphere, we have at best applied bandaids.
  - gruseom 15y ago
    I don't really agree. As many men as women will never want to stay at home and raise the children, unless the whole thing really is culturally constructed and biology has nought to do with it, which I think is naive and ideological. If by D/s you mean domination and submission - I'll take love between equals, thanks.
- 127 15y ago
  I actually respect and admire women who enjoy the submissive role. Thus, when I say it I mean it as a compliment.

gruseom 15y ago

"Submissive" is pejorative. You might as well say "bitch" (edit: almost). I mightn't have picked up on this if he hadn't also said "everything difficult and challenging". I actually agree with the point about feminism being to some extent a prejudice of its own that makes some women feel bad about wanting what they want. But they're figuring it out. We're, what, 50 years into this? That's lightning-fast change. It's fine to let the pendulum swing back and forth a few times. The more pressing question in the long run might be how we got into a situation where both men and women have to work full-time in order to have things (like a house) that a single-salary family used to be able to afford.

roguecoder 15y ago
The problem is that we gave women more options without actually dismantling patriarchy. We just gave them the option to join in men's crappy patriarchal bargain, which still kind of sucks. If feminism had succeeded as many men as women would want to stay at home in a D/s relationship and raise the children, though I think there would also be Doms who'd want to stay home and raise children. As long as we think of "Staying Home and Raising Children" as something women do, or something that is a separate and mutually exclusive choice with being in the public sphere, we have at best applied bandaids.
- gruseom 15y ago
  I don't really agree. As many men as women will never want to stay at home and raise the children, unless the whole thing really is culturally constructed and biology has nought to do with it, which I think is naive and ideological. If by D/s you mean domination and submission - I'll take love between equals, thanks.
127 15y ago
I actually respect and admire women who enjoy the submissive role. Thus, when I say it I mean it as a compliment.