4 ms·

Shut it down and move on.

whentojoin 4y ago
My cofounder tells me I am guilty if I don't stick with him keep building, even if it is something else. He quit his job to join me, and I am wasting his years of life if I quit. I am wondering if I am being a bad person.
- mudrockbestgirl 4y ago
  You are not a bad person because of that. It was his decision, and joining an early-stage startup comes with exactly the kind of risks you are describing. If he was not aware of that, that's completely his fault for making bad uninformed decisions. The fact that he tries to make you feel guilty is a huge red flag. Do you really want to work with that kind of person in the long term?
  - whentojoin 4y ago
    That's the thing I am pondering about. He tells me if I don't keep do a startup now the next time I do it will be like 5-10 years later. I will have kids, etc. But I know say if I take a break of say 1-2 years I can start a new startup, whether I have a family or not. I might even do some side projects even before then and see how it goes. I am wondering if he says that out of his self interest or for me.
- andirk 4y ago
  He can get another job. I feel his and your pain, but give me a break.
- naet 4y ago
  He can hire someone to replace you if he thinks it can succeed. Or continue to work on it on his own without you. He sounds like he is being a bad person if he's keeping you there against your will or using guilt as a motivator. You are vague about what your startup is or what the issue is preventing your launch. If it's ready, just launch it on zero budget and see what happens. If you need more money it isn't ready. Can it stay in "zombie mode" without you working on it actively? Why or why not?
  - whentojoin 4y ago
    I am intentionally making it vague to protect the privacy. But the business we are in require millions of dollars to launch (after the code is ready). Without that much of money, the product provides 0 value. --- He can hire someone to replace you if he thinks it can succeed. Or continue to work on it on his own without you. >> You are spot on. I am not stopping him from doing that. This makes me feel much better. Thanks.
    - HWR_14 4y ago
      --- He can hire someone to replace you if he thinks it can succeed. Or continue to work on it on his own without you. >> You are spot on. I am not stopping him from doing that. This makes me feel much better. Thanks. If you want to go this route, letting them move on while you do something else, you have a major consideration. You own a giant chunk, maybe even a majority, of the equity. That can make it hard for them to be motivated, hard for them to make legal decisions, hard to get investments, etc. Consider selling (or giving if you really think it is worthless) enough to the partner you are leaving behind so that they can succeed. Or just make it easy to dilute you (I assume it's a tax question which is better). If you do, feel free to make it fair to you as well. Maybe you get to use some code in another project in a dual-use situation? Maybe your cofounder vests the chance to buy your stock over a few years so he doesn't just cut you out and then pocket everything as it dissolves? Retain a fair amount of equity for the work you already did.
- joshxyz 4y ago
  well you sold him to this and you're the first one considering the idea of backing out just because things didnt go as planned. maybe he's all-in on this already thats why he said those things too. there might be other ways around this, there moght be still time left to correctly operate in this scenario.

My cofounder tells me I am guilty if I don't stick with him keep building, even if it is something else. He quit his job to join me, and I am wasting his years of life if I quit. I am wondering if I am being a bad person.

mudrockbestgirl 4y ago
You are not a bad person because of that. It was his decision, and joining an early-stage startup comes with exactly the kind of risks you are describing. If he was not aware of that, that's completely his fault for making bad uninformed decisions. The fact that he tries to make you feel guilty is a huge red flag. Do you really want to work with that kind of person in the long term?
- whentojoin 4y ago
  That's the thing I am pondering about. He tells me if I don't keep do a startup now the next time I do it will be like 5-10 years later. I will have kids, etc. But I know say if I take a break of say 1-2 years I can start a new startup, whether I have a family or not. I might even do some side projects even before then and see how it goes. I am wondering if he says that out of his self interest or for me.
andirk 4y ago
He can get another job. I feel his and your pain, but give me a break.
naet 4y ago
He can hire someone to replace you if he thinks it can succeed. Or continue to work on it on his own without you. He sounds like he is being a bad person if he's keeping you there against your will or using guilt as a motivator. You are vague about what your startup is or what the issue is preventing your launch. If it's ready, just launch it on zero budget and see what happens. If you need more money it isn't ready. Can it stay in "zombie mode" without you working on it actively? Why or why not?
- whentojoin 4y ago
  I am intentionally making it vague to protect the privacy. But the business we are in require millions of dollars to launch (after the code is ready). Without that much of money, the product provides 0 value. --- He can hire someone to replace you if he thinks it can succeed. Or continue to work on it on his own without you. >> You are spot on. I am not stopping him from doing that. This makes me feel much better. Thanks.
  - HWR_14 4y ago
    --- He can hire someone to replace you if he thinks it can succeed. Or continue to work on it on his own without you. >> You are spot on. I am not stopping him from doing that. This makes me feel much better. Thanks. If you want to go this route, letting them move on while you do something else, you have a major consideration. You own a giant chunk, maybe even a majority, of the equity. That can make it hard for them to be motivated, hard for them to make legal decisions, hard to get investments, etc. Consider selling (or giving if you really think it is worthless) enough to the partner you are leaving behind so that they can succeed. Or just make it easy to dilute you (I assume it's a tax question which is better). If you do, feel free to make it fair to you as well. Maybe you get to use some code in another project in a dual-use situation? Maybe your cofounder vests the chance to buy your stock over a few years so he doesn't just cut you out and then pocket everything as it dissolves? Retain a fair amount of equity for the work you already did.
joshxyz 4y ago
well you sold him to this and you're the first one considering the idea of backing out just because things didnt go as planned. maybe he's all-in on this already thats why he said those things too. there might be other ways around this, there moght be still time left to correctly operate in this scenario.