1) You gotta play the hand you're dealt. 2) You need to be able to flip back & forth between the very big picture and the individual view. 3) The narrative is

1) You gotta play the hand you're dealt. 2) You need to be able to flip back & forth between the very big picture and the individual view. 3) The narrative is constructible, and being able to flip back & forth between individual and societal and cosmic views helps you construct the narrative with better perspective. Cosmic level: we're all gonna die and the vast universe will barely notice. But we're as much part of the universe as Mars and the Sun and the Andromeda galaxy. Individual level: my coworker got a promotion does that mean I will not get a promotion. Also I notice I'm being treated differently at work because of my demographic characteristics. Play the hand you're dealt and create a better narrative for yourself: my coworker's promotion demonstrates that promotions can be gotten. Here are the ingredients that went into their promotion. These are things I can do (I can construct a parallel network of champions at work, I can position myself as a complementary force whose promotion will also benefit the company). Here is the reality of the situation. This situation will either play out to my advantage, or not. Here are ways I can change the situation entirely (get an outside offer, switch groups). What's worth doing? You can ~never escape society's context: if you're not socially fluent, or not attractive, or an immigrant, or abnormally attractive, or whatever, that's all what it is. But people "like you" have succeeded, for almost any value of "success" you choose. So what do you want and how can you get there? Life is like Mad Libs. It's a random collection of stuff that you need to assemble into a narrative. The narrative is yours to construct. Too many people think it is set for them.