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> prefer to socialize in other settings Can someone shed some light on this? I'm in the office for at least 40 hours a week. Then each day I get home, cook din

> prefer to socialize in other settings Can someone shed some light on this? I'm in the office for at least 40 hours a week. Then each day I get home, cook dinner, clean, bathe, workout sometimes. I don't even have kids or a long commute. If I'm not socializing at work, when am I doing it? Two days a week? That is bleeeeaak.

hhmc 4y ago
40hours a week is 8 hours a day. Let's say you sleep 8 hours. Let's also be conservative and say you have a 1 hour commute each way. That's still 6 hours left. It's pretty easy to find some socialization time in there unless you're taking 4 hour long showers. This isn't just theoretical, _clearly_ many people socialize in the evenings.
- yupper32 4y ago
  By the time I work out, get home, cook dinner, eat dinner, clean, shower, it's like 8pm usually. No one around me is staying out past like 10pm on a weekday. Now I have the job of finding anyone who wants to hang out from 8pm to 10pm on a weekday when both/all of us are exhausted from a long day. Doing the hard math and saying I have 6 hours is just theoretical. _Many_ people may socialize in the evenings, but I'd be surprised _most_ do.
  - hhmc 4y ago
    If you meet someone for dinner you don't need to cook/eat/clean. Perhaps you could choose not to workout every evening. It might not come for free, but you can make it happen if you actually want it to happen.
  - doix 4y ago
    I had a similar realization at a certain point. I was wasting too much time on chores, so I optimized them out of my life. Replace all food at home with Huel. No more cooking, no more cleaning, no more shopping (no more driving to stores), no more wondering if you can go out for dinner or if food will spoil. Make sure all your clothes can be washed together (either all tones of grey, or all colours). Make sure all your socks are the same. Do washing once a week on a weekend. Move closer to your office to eliminate commute. You don't cook anymore, so can get a place without a good kitchen for cheap. Suddenly you have infinite time. For what it's worth, I would socialize with people from work (and ex-coworkers) after work. 5pm, off to the pub or a restaurant. Then walk home since I'd live near the office which would be near the pub/restaurant (since we are going after work).
    - yupper32 4y ago
      > Replace all food at home with Huel. Oh dear, you've already lost me.
- WorldMaker 4y ago
  That's assuming that you don't have to pop all of your spell slots to get through the 8 hour work day. The 8 hour work day was chosen pretty precisely to be exactly exhausting enough in a menial labor factory assembly job that you return home with very little energy for anything else. If you presume your job is more (creatively, socially) taxing than "repeatedly doing the same task in an assembly" line, it's very easy to assume most jobs today are more exhausting in 8 hour shifts than what that work week was first established for. You may have 6 hours of time left, but that doesn't mean you have 6 hours of energy reserves left to socialize or otherwise. (Clearly many people spend their evenings in low effort activities like watching TV on weeknights, too.)
kroltan 4y ago
8 hours at work, 8 sleeping, that's still 8 more left. I would be surprised if you took all of them to cook and clean. Even with 4 hours of chores a day, that's still 4 hours to do whatever you want. Doesn't mean you spend them all that day, or all of them socializing. Maybe you use mondays to study, tuesdays you spend more time cleaning so wednesdays you can go out do something. Also consider that if you strictly socialise in a work context, most of those relationships will grow distant relatively quickly when you or they leave for another company, which means it's harder to build long lasting friendships. Those can be really handy at times of transition in your life, which is where work friends usually fail first.
- yupper32 4y ago
  Why do so many people try to do the hard math when it comes to this? The reality is by the time I am able to go out on a weekday it's like 8pm. Very few of my peers, friends or not, want to go out late on a weekday after already having a long day. If you're able to do better than that, then you are in an uncommon bracket.
  - kroltan 4y ago
    Well, not sure how else to approach you with the fact that there is more time than you give credit to. Also, 8pm? How much time do you spend on commute? Do you live in a mansion and don't hire a cleaning person? To be fair, I personally am on an uncommon bracket where I usually socialise over the internet, people who make games tend to like playing them too, and there is no commute. That said, you're still framing it as a work thing. Your peers can do whatever they want, but the rest of the world still exists. Unless you're saying everyone within 20min of your commute path also follow this routine pattern, but then I would expect you to be on an uncommon bracket. There are countless activities you can partake that involve interacting with other people and give you opportunity to create friends.
    - yupper32 4y ago
      > Also, 8pm? How much time do you spend on commute Leave work at 5 (hopefully!). Gym/exercise for an hour, commute for 30min, dinner for an hour. That's already 7:30pm. Add in chores or errands or distractions or whatever and 8pm comes quick. Like yeah, I could start doing microwave dinners or not exercising or replace all my food with Huel like someone actually suggested in the comments here. Or move right next to the office or leave work early. But my god I'm not going to hyper optimize my life in order to maybe see people late on a weekday. My whole point in this entire thread is that I socialize during work. At lunch, during breaks, between meetings, etc. Time I would have not been working anyway (because I'm not a robot). This is what people have been doing forever just fine.

hhmc 4y ago

40hours a week is 8 hours a day. Let's say you sleep 8 hours. Let's also be conservative and say you have a 1 hour commute each way. That's still 6 hours left. It's pretty easy to find some socialization time in there unless you're taking 4 hour long showers. This isn't just theoretical, _clearly_ many people socialize in the evenings.

yupper32 4y ago
By the time I work out, get home, cook dinner, eat dinner, clean, shower, it's like 8pm usually. No one around me is staying out past like 10pm on a weekday. Now I have the job of finding anyone who wants to hang out from 8pm to 10pm on a weekday when both/all of us are exhausted from a long day. Doing the hard math and saying I have 6 hours is just theoretical. _Many_ people may socialize in the evenings, but I'd be surprised _most_ do.
- hhmc 4y ago
  If you meet someone for dinner you don't need to cook/eat/clean. Perhaps you could choose not to workout every evening. It might not come for free, but you can make it happen if you actually want it to happen.
- doix 4y ago
  I had a similar realization at a certain point. I was wasting too much time on chores, so I optimized them out of my life. Replace all food at home with Huel. No more cooking, no more cleaning, no more shopping (no more driving to stores), no more wondering if you can go out for dinner or if food will spoil. Make sure all your clothes can be washed together (either all tones of grey, or all colours). Make sure all your socks are the same. Do washing once a week on a weekend. Move closer to your office to eliminate commute. You don't cook anymore, so can get a place without a good kitchen for cheap. Suddenly you have infinite time. For what it's worth, I would socialize with people from work (and ex-coworkers) after work. 5pm, off to the pub or a restaurant. Then walk home since I'd live near the office which would be near the pub/restaurant (since we are going after work).
  - yupper32 4y ago
    > Replace all food at home with Huel. Oh dear, you've already lost me.
WorldMaker 4y ago
That's assuming that you don't have to pop all of your spell slots to get through the 8 hour work day. The 8 hour work day was chosen pretty precisely to be exactly exhausting enough in a menial labor factory assembly job that you return home with very little energy for anything else. If you presume your job is more (creatively, socially) taxing than "repeatedly doing the same task in an assembly" line, it's very easy to assume most jobs today are more exhausting in 8 hour shifts than what that work week was first established for. You may have 6 hours of time left, but that doesn't mean you have 6 hours of energy reserves left to socialize or otherwise. (Clearly many people spend their evenings in low effort activities like watching TV on weeknights, too.)

kroltan 4y ago

8 hours at work, 8 sleeping, that's still 8 more left. I would be surprised if you took all of them to cook and clean. Even with 4 hours of chores a day, that's still 4 hours to do whatever you want. Doesn't mean you spend them all that day, or all of them socializing. Maybe you use mondays to study, tuesdays you spend more time cleaning so wednesdays you can go out do something. Also consider that if you strictly socialise in a work context, most of those relationships will grow distant relatively quickly when you or they leave for another company, which means it's harder to build long lasting friendships. Those can be really handy at times of transition in your life, which is where work friends usually fail first.

yupper32 4y ago
Why do so many people try to do the hard math when it comes to this? The reality is by the time I am able to go out on a weekday it's like 8pm. Very few of my peers, friends or not, want to go out late on a weekday after already having a long day. If you're able to do better than that, then you are in an uncommon bracket.
- kroltan 4y ago
  Well, not sure how else to approach you with the fact that there is more time than you give credit to. Also, 8pm? How much time do you spend on commute? Do you live in a mansion and don't hire a cleaning person? To be fair, I personally am on an uncommon bracket where I usually socialise over the internet, people who make games tend to like playing them too, and there is no commute. That said, you're still framing it as a work thing. Your peers can do whatever they want, but the rest of the world still exists. Unless you're saying everyone within 20min of your commute path also follow this routine pattern, but then I would expect you to be on an uncommon bracket. There are countless activities you can partake that involve interacting with other people and give you opportunity to create friends.
  - yupper32 4y ago
    > Also, 8pm? How much time do you spend on commute Leave work at 5 (hopefully!). Gym/exercise for an hour, commute for 30min, dinner for an hour. That's already 7:30pm. Add in chores or errands or distractions or whatever and 8pm comes quick. Like yeah, I could start doing microwave dinners or not exercising or replace all my food with Huel like someone actually suggested in the comments here. Or move right next to the office or leave work early. But my god I'm not going to hyper optimize my life in order to maybe see people late on a weekday. My whole point in this entire thread is that I socialize during work. At lunch, during breaks, between meetings, etc. Time I would have not been working anyway (because I'm not a robot). This is what people have been doing forever just fine.